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What I Watched Last Night

By Pat Bataillon

Monday night headaches, it must be Election Day! I get tense when I watch political coverage the night before any election; been that way for a couple of cycles. I watch every time with anticipation and ridicule the pundits and disagree with all them and think that I am oh-so-smart. They all talk different agendas. MSNBC was speaking to the dirty politics of the Republicans; apparently the GOPers are robo-calling Democrats with dirty tricks. CNN has their election coverage going on all night with a panel of experts; they cover all the angles of all the States. Wolf Blitzer is such a fake name by the way. But my favorite of all, of course, is FOX News. FOX News was issuing warnings about what would happen if the Democrats win the House and not the Senate. Somehow the terrorists in Iraq killed more Americans this last month because they want to the Democrats to win. This was actually said by a commentator on Hannity and Colmes. Terrorists are Democrats and Democrats are terrorists.


Democrats are going to raise my taxes. Democrats want to let all the illegal immigrants into the good ole US of A. Democrats kill babies. Democrats hate freedom. The Democrats are going to cut and run from Iraq. Democrats are weak on foreign policy. Democrats are wafflers. Democrats are liars. Democrats hate Catholics. Democrats hate God. Democrats hate everyone but themselves.
This is the talk we have been hearing for the last few years – all pretty compelling stuff. Since all of these statements above I heard from a fair and balanced news source they must be true.
Now, here is a little logical lesson for all you voters out there this morning. If the Democrats are
all these things then the Republicans must be the opposite! Great news! The Republicans are the following: not terrorists, not raising my taxes, not killing babies, not hating freedom, not cutting and running from Iraq, not weak on foreign policy, not waffling, not lying, not hating Catholics or God, and not hating themselves.
So we know whom we should vote for – the people who are not the other people.
The people who are not the other people are for everything good and sunny. I don’t want to kill babies either; I just want to see that women aren’t told what to do by a government. I think that a woman can think for herself about what to do with a baby, it is hers anyway. I don’t hate freedom; I think that we should evaluate what freedom is other than a red, white and blue word that is thrown around. I know that freedom is not taking away habeas corpus and the right to fair trial and phone tapping and surveillance at every corner. And I don’t want to cut and run from Iraq; in fact I don’t know what to do with that place.
There is no reason to point blame at all the faults in the reasoning why we went over there because that is not preventing people from dying. Think about it: Why are Americans over in Iraq dying? Why?
As for the other arguments, that is the way politics is played. Both sides waffle and both sides pander to their base be it Catholics or Atheists, rich or poor, farmers or city dwellers. It’s all nonsense.
This whole charade that this country goes through every two years is truly nonsense. Everyone lies to each other and everyone loses because the voters vote based on which candidates they hate, not which candidates they love. With so much hate being injected into our daily lives it is no surprise that we are at war and don’t realize it. It is no surprise that basic freedoms are being burned out of the Constitution and not enough people realize it. People are dying, and according to the people at FOX News it is because the terrorists want the Democrats to win.
I am sorry, dear readers, but if you think that anything on FOX News is accurate you should not be voting.
So on this midterm election day, I say again to those 25 percent of you that do go out and vote, please choose wisely. I am sick of people lying and dying.

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Posted on November 7, 2006