By Marty Gangler
As this season progresses, Cub fans just have no choice but to look at the future. I mean, you could watch this team now and hope they turn it around. But you’d be kind of insane to do so. Nope. As it’s been written and talked about all year, the 2012 season is all about the 2014-and-beyond season. Read that again, this is just weird.
With this being the given, what is there left to say about the worst team in baseball in 2012? Why, it’s what we’ll get out of being so horrendous! It’ll be the number one pick in the 2013 draft. The baseball draft. We’re not even talking about the NFL draft. We’re talking about the baseball draft. It’s like talking about practice. It’s the draft. In baseball. The baseball draft.
For all the lore about lovable losers, have Cub fans ever wanted the team to come in last before? For a draft pick? Sure, we’ve wanted the team to be horrible in the past so guys like Dusty Baker and Jim Hendry would get fired and bring about some fundamental change, but now that the change has happened, it’s all about . . . the draft. The baseball draft. Not the NFL. Not even the 2012 draft. The 2013 draft. In baseball.
So, to the interwebs I went to see who is projected to be the man to go first in the draft in 2013. There seem to be a few guys that could be drafted numero uno in 2013 – according to this site that I’ve never been on before. The cool thing is that there is a clip of one of the top pitchers and one of the top hitters against each other. Take a look. Did you see that? Seriously, go watch the clip and come back.
So if I had to pick one of these two guys I’d take Austin Wilson based on the one clip I’ve seen. And how interesting that this clip was from a game at Wrigley? And how further interesting that even with no one in the stands the ghosts of Wrigley threw the home run ball back on to the field. Which has to mean that Austin Wilson will never be a Cub. So there you go.
Week in Review: The Cubs brought the lumber out on Memorial Day and beat the Padres 11-7. It was their first win in two weeks. And it keeps their streak of winning games when they score eight or more runs intact. Really, eight runs is the key, you heard it here.
The Week in Preview: The Cub stay home for two more with the Padres and then travel west for four with the Giants. I’d complain about the weird four-game trip to San Fran – and then the Cubs come back to the Midwest – but really, is a weird road trip worth complaining about at this point?
The Second Basemen Report: Seven games this week (and a day) and Darwin Barney started six of them. Adrian Cardenas got the lone other start. It’s too bad Cardenas isn’t very good because Barney is proving to be who he is. Which is a guy who should never be starting on a major league roster. But that’s just how the ghost of Jim Hendry would have drawn it up.
In former second basemen news, Charles Roscoe Barnes last played second base for the Chicago White Stockings of the National League in 1877. Some people consider this team the first incarnation of the Cubs. Charles had one good year 1876, when he led the league in triples (14) and he is certainly missed.
Crazy Corners: Changes are afoot at third base with Super Joe Mather getting a few more looks and batting third in Dizzy Dale’s new lineup. Cardenas got a start at third too, but Ian Stewart went and had himself a nice Memorial Day (2-for-4, 3 RBIs, 1 HR). Brian LaHR had a rough week but might have hit his way out of it on Monday as well with three hits, three runs and one RBI. He still has a OBP over .400.
Weekly Bunting Report: I think they count bunts to the pitcher as a “comebacker” so it’s not hard to imagine that a guy that tries to bunt pretty much every time he come to the plate would lead the league in “comebacks.” Congrats, Campy!
The Zam Bomb: Just when you thought he had it all figured out, Big Z made the ball go boom – for opposing hitters. This has Big Z Getting Angry. But he’s had more of a solid year than most thought he was capable of thus far.
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Endorsement No-Brainer: Rahm Emanuel for the opposite of Wrigley Field renovations.
Ameritrade Stock Pick of the Week: Shares of Schlage locking systems traded higher this week as there is a run on closers on the North Side of Chicago.
Sink or Sveum: 46% Analytical, 54% Emotional. Sveum drops another eight points on the Dale-O-Meter this week due to batting a guy like Super Joe Mather third on a consistent basis. On a scale of Bat Sh#t Crazy (Charles Manson), Not All There (random guy with a neck tattoo), Thinking Clearly (Jordi LaForge), and Non-Emotional Robot (Data), Dale is getting some sweet ink this week.
And just like your thought-to-be level-headed uncle, Dale was in charge of moving around the deck chairs on the Titanic. It was kind of pointless.
Over/Under: Wins this week: +/- 1.5. Also, it doesn’t really matter.
Don’t Hassle The Hoff: Looks like Micah Hoffpauir has a .448 on-base percentage. But I’m really not sure, what a hassle!
Beachwood Sabermetrics: A complex algorithm performed by The Cub Factor staff using all historical data made available by Major League Baseball has determined that last week was tough to watch.
The Cub Factor: Unlike Alfonso Soriano, you can catch ’em all!
The White Sox Report: Know the enemy.
Fantasy Fix: Dual Diagnosis.
Swings Both Ways: Cheap Sweep.
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Posted on May 28, 2012