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The Beachwood Radio Sports Hour #101: Chicago Baseball Is The One Dog

By Jim Coffman and Steve Rhodes

Cubs can pick any eight players and put ’em at any position and they’ll win. Plus: Crane Kenney, Still Employed By Cubs, Strikes Again; Rahm Emanuel Is The Crane Kenney Of Mayors; Dusty Cannot Be Trustied; Rogers!; Ding Dong Danks; Leicester vs. Lester, and much, much more!



SHOW NOTES
* The One Dog.
* With the Cubs.
4:20 Cubs Pick Any Eight Players, Win.
* Thursday night’s lineup.
* Are Javier Baez And Jorge Soler Headed In Opposite Directions? Joe Maddon Weighs In.
* Ben Gonzobrist.
* Jason Heywrist.
* Dexter Fouler.
* Addition Russell.
19:46: Cubs Contract Chasms.
* Jake Arrieta.
* Theo Epstein.
24:30: Crane Kenney, Still Employed By Cubs, Strikes Again.
* Liquor not quicker.
* Quigley goes wiggly on Wrigley.
* Kenney at 27:07: EVERY FAMILY WHO STAYS IN THE CITY INSTEAD OF MOVING TO THE SUBURBS IS BEING IRRESPONSIBLE BECAUSE OF THE SCHOOLS. Every rich white family, I suppose he means.
* Crane Kenney Sells One Winnetka Home, Buys Another.
28:54: Rahm Emanuel Is The Crane Kenney Of City Government.
* George Lucas Donates $25 Million To The Needy U Of C Lab Schools.
* Mellody Hobson Unloads On Friends Of The Parks For Asking Federal Judge To Enforce The Law, Which He Has Done So Far By Simply Allowing Lawsuit To Proceed.
* Hell hath no fury like entitled rich people scorned.



34:25: Cubs Kill Late Friday Afternoon Start Times. Kenney!
38:43: In Dusty We Can’t Stand.
* Why Dusty Baker Pushed Prior, Wood So Hard, According To Dusty Baker.
* FYI, Dusty’s bullpen that year was Joe “Beer Can” Borowski (33 of the team’s 36 saves, 2.0 WAR; Hector Rondon had 30 saves last year, 2.2 WAR), Kyle Farnsworth, Mike Remlinger, Antonio Alfonseca and Mark Guthrie.
* FYI, Cubs payroll rank in 2003: 11th. Cubs payroll rank in 2015: 13th.
* Dusty cannot be trustied.
* “At the end of the day, boys, don’t tell me how rough the water is, you bring in the ship.”
* Don’t forget: Dusty Baker is the reason why Steve Stone is now in the White Sox booth and not the Cubs booth where he belongs. (And Crane Kenney is probably the reason why Bob Brenly is in the Diamondbacks booth and not the Cubs booth, where he belongs.)
* Dusty Baker is also a racist clown.
41:33: Rogers!


* Reminder: Baker sat at home for two years despite trying to inject himself into various managerial openings because no one was interested in being the fourth team to fire him.
* Coach goes off on ESPN fanboy.
43:57: Oh Yeah, The White Sox.
* White Sox Designate John Danks, Recall Erik Johnson.
* White Sox Recall Scott Carroll To Replace Erik Johnson.
* Cubs should loan White Sox a starter every fifth day.
* Ding Dong Danks.
* Bernstein: White Sox Should Find A Lefty Bat.
51:33: Lucky Lester.
* Not funny.
54:13: Pirates Disclaimer.
57:27: Hoyer, Yes; Tight Ends, No.
58:01: Joe Paterno Was An Even Worse Human Being Than We Thought.
1:00:56: TrackNotes: This Year’s Derby A Value Proposition.
1:03:20: Everton vs. Lestah!
* The Cubs of England.
* 5 Things You Need To Know About Leicester.
* Leicester vs. Lester:
Leicester: Wins first.
Lester: Can’t throw to first.

STOPPAGE: 4:58

For archives and other Beachwood shows, see The Beachwood Radio Network.

Comments welcome.

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Posted on May 6, 2016