By Mike Luce

Car wash attendant turned jazz singer Landau Eugene Murphy Jr. opened the LSU-West Virginia game Saturday night at Mountaineer Field in front of 62,056 ravenous WVU fans. Regardless of your feelings about America’s Got Talent, soul singers or car washes, Murphy’s story is a good one. Homeless at the age of 19, Murphy dedicated himself to singing while scraping by on odd jobs. We confess, we didn’t know who the hell this guy was or why the crowd was so fired up about his performance but a bit of Googling turned up news of his AGT (as the kids call it) win and – more important for fans of the home team – his hometown: Logan, West Virginia.
We were also puzzled by the emblem on Eugene’s snappy WVU jacket. Perhaps we are conditioned to ignore more familiar corporate badges on team gear and uniforms, such as Nike, Russell and Under Armour, but a logo like “Friends of Coal” stands out.

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Posted on September 28, 2011

By Dan O’Shea

Fantasy football leagues enter Week 4 with injuries and statistical underachievement still marring the performance of many of the sport’s brightest stars.
Kenny Britt, WR, Tennessee, who had unexpectedly surged to the top of the WR ranks from the opening bell, is done for the season with a knee injury. He joins top RB Jamaal Charles, Kansas City, on fantasy IR. Meanwhile, Indianapolis continues to force Peyton Manning owners to retain him in hopes of a late-season return, though all signs suggest Manning should be on IR and done for the year.
Injury woes also continue to court owners of Arian Foster, RB, Houston, who went No. 1 in some preseason drafts. Foster may return stronger for Week 4, but his lingering problems have forced him into a likely time-share with Ben Tate. If you’re a Foster owner, either acquire Tate, or ship him to Tate’s current owner to recover some value.
Injuries aren’t the only problem. Most of the Yahoo! preseason top 10 is in a shambles. The brightest star has been Raiders running back Darren McFadden rewarding owners who might have gambled to take him higher than his No. 7 preseason rank. He’s currently the top-ranked RB in Yahoo! leagues, followed closely by LeSean McCoy, who was ranked No. 11 in the preseason by Yahoo!
McFadden and McCoy are ranked third and fourth overall, behind that reliable New England pair, Tom Brady and Wes Welker. Brady and Welker were expected to both have great seasons, though they have been unexpectedly dominant, with Brady leading all passers in yards and TDs, and Welker leading all WRs in receiving yards and total fantasy points.
So, what of the Yahoo! preseason top 10? Here they are by original rank, what’s gone wrong and what to expect for the rest of the season:

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Posted on September 27, 2011

By Jim Coffman

Other than Brian Urlacher’s interceptions, there isn’t anything special about the Bears right now. There are no stellar playmakers leaving foes gasping for air. There are no defensive dervishes demanding attention on every snap.
Their special teams were almost special in the last two minutes on Sunday, of course. But then the Bears were called for holding an imaginary player on Johnny Knox’s punt return for touchdown (after Devin Hester’s epic fake) and that was that. The Packers prevailed 27-17 to drop the Bears to an aggravating 1-2.
The Packers on the other hand, couldn’t be more special. They’re so special they make you want to puke. How did this happen? How did they set up camp on the sporting mountaintop with such a relatively inexperienced team (second youngest in the league), led by a 27-year-old quarterback who could do absolutely no wrong throughout the playoffs last year and is doing it again so far this time around? General Manager Ted Thompson is smart but he isn’t that smart. Coach Mike McCarthy is a great play-caller but the offense he ran in San Francisco the year before he took over the Pack finished last in the NFL. Argh.

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Posted on September 26, 2011

By Roger Wallenstein

It was one of those spring days early in the 1985 season when the air was brisk, optimism reigned, and the ballpark was lively.
On old friend found me walking in the aisle between third and home. His eyes were dancing and his energy was contagious. He said something like, “Have you seen this kid? Isn’t he fabulous? I love the way he plays.”
Of course, he was referring to 21-year-old rookie shortstop Ozzie Guillen, who had come over from San Diego during the winter in a trade for pitcher LaMarr Hoyt.

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Posted on September 26, 2011

By Mike Luce

In mid-August, as the Texas A&M Board of Regents mulled the move to the Southeastern Conference, the axis of the college football world (and sports commentary in general) went on tilt. The Texas A&M Aggies, of all people (things?), seemed poised to violate the sanctity of the Big Six power conferences.
But a closer look at the conferences in question offers some perspective on all the hysteria.
We take issue with the reasons behind the latest realignment (never that noble historically, much less today), and would rather focus on root causes and leave the hand-wringing to others.
Besides, it’s not as if the regents nailed a list of grievances to the Big 12 headquarters, although it’s possible A&M just didn’t have a printer big enough enough to handle the task.
We wish the Aggies all the best, although the consensus around the water cooler paints a bleak picture for their prospects against the likes of LSU, Alabama, Auburn, Tennessee, Georgia and Florida. Yikes. Why would anyone willingly walk into that lions’ (and Volunteers, and Bulldogs, and Gators . . . ) den? We have a theory – see below.

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Posted on September 23, 2011

By Carl Mohrbacher

Number Six Is Sick Of Sacks
The Bears QB spent more time on his back than a $5 prosti-turtle flipped on its shell. The good news is that there is no way Cutler will be sacked 52 times in 2011, like he was in 2010. The bad news is that he will only play nine games in 2011.
Runnin’ With The Devil
Many have demanded to know why the Bears didn’t attempt more rushing plays against the Saints. In an abbreviated press conference, Mike Martz briefly mumbled something about running backs who can’t run between the tackles “don’t get no paper” before announcing loudly that he had a bad case of diarrhea and stormed away from the podium.
Sha-not, Shalom
Gabe Carimi is likely to miss Sunday’s tilt with the Packers due to a knee injury, which means other than third-string long snapper Saul Bramburg, there are no Hebrews on the active roster. In order to meet the NFL roster requirements, Mort “Big Jew” Williams from accounting will be backing up Frank Omiyale.

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Posted on September 22, 2011

By Carl Mohrbacher

I have tickets to the last home game of 2011. Should I go?
-J.J., Abrams WI
Of course!
In addition to potentially seeing Starlin Castro’s 200th hit, there are at least 10 good reasons to attend.
* You’ll see the last game Mike Quade manages at Wrigley Field.
* It will be the only time in history a baseball team that included eight black cattle ranchers clinched a division . . . at least in the National League.
* Marlee Matlin is singing the seventh-inning stretch.
• The Ricketts family has opted to replace the face-painting booth with a nipple-painting booth.

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Posted on September 22, 2011

By Emory Hunt/The Czar of the Playbook

Zone blitz kills Cutler.

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Posted on September 21, 2011

By The Premier Showcase

“Founded in 1999 by professional gymnast Tim Shaw, these young inner city youth are taught discipline, respect, hard work, integrity and teamwork. Members must maintain a ‘C’ average in school, are not allowed to drop out of school, associate with gangs, drugs, alcohol or tobacco. Through Tim’s positive impact, many kids have not only become professional polished gymnasts, but turned their lives around in the process.”

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Posted on September 21, 2011

By Jim Coffman

The killer about the Bears’ 30-13 loss to the Saints on Sunday was the fact that the game was there for the contesting about five minutes into the third quarter. The Bear defense had risen up to start the second half and recorded a pair of three-and-outs. The offense was a few first downs away from a field goal to tie (at 16) if not a touchdown to take the lead.
But then a Saints blitzer, linebacker Turk McBride, slipped around tight end Kellen Davis, blind-sided Jay Cutler and forced a fumble that New Orleans recovered. A minute or two later the home team scored a touchdown to take a 23-13 lead and the Bears were in trouble.
Here was yet another game in which one critical turnover at one critical time was decisive.

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Posted on September 19, 2011