Chicago - A message from the station manager

Underappreciated Player Too Expensive For Dysfunctional Franchise

Unlike Derrick Rose, Luol Deng is a leader and great humanitarian – and a player the Bulls didn’t care to keep.
1. The Silent Star by Dunkman827.

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Posted on January 8, 2014

Exclusive: Inside Jay Cutler’s Contract

Another Beachwood Special Report

So it turns out Jay Cutler’s monstrous 7-year, 126.7 million contract is really just a middling 3-year, $54 million contract with club options thereafter.
The Beachwood, as it is wont to do, has obtained further exclusive details about the deal:
* Three bonus pouts per game.
* Nine bonus shrugs per press conference.
* Working Ventra card.
* Urlacher’s old parking space once Urlacher finally moves his RV out of there.
* Private locker next to the training room.
* Obamacare Gold Insurance Plan.
* Doesn’t have to play against Green Bay.

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Posted on January 7, 2014

SportsMonday: Don’t Buy What Cubs Are Selling

By Jim Coffman

Well into his third off-season at the helm of the Cubs, we know one thing about chairman Tom Ricketts: He is more concerned with making money than he is with winning. The evidence is overwhelming.
After football seasons crash and burn, the longstanding tradition of fans brushing themselves off and saying something like “six weeks ’til pitchers and catchers report!” kicks in. And oh by the way, there are (a little less than!) six weeks until Cubs pitchers and catchers report to good ol’ Mesa for spring training.
So on a brutally cold day in Chicago, we turn our attention to baseball and we dream of sunny skies in temperate Arizona. Before we know it, it will be February 13 and the opening of baseball’s extended preseason will occur.

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Posted on January 6, 2014

The College Football Report: Jimmy Kimmel, Pistol Pete & The Discover Card

By Mike Luce

The past few days have been an orgy of college football, with the weekend – the prime-rib station of the bowl season buffet – still ahead. Following the Sugar Bowl on Thursday night, 30 games are in the books. Some observations on the results so far:

  • Favorites have delivered as expected, going 17-13 straight up.
  • To our unending amazement, the point spreads were dead-on: favorites have “covered” exactly half of the 30 games after Alabama failed to beat the 1- point spread against Oklahoma in the Sugar Bowl on Thursday night.
  • The “chalk” has performed better in low-scoring games, with favorites covering nearly all the low scoring games: 12 of the 15 covers came in games with point totals under the Vegas Over/Under line for total points.
  • Overall, offensive output has trended downward, somewhat contrary to the huge point totals posted throughout the regular season. The under has fared well, with 19 of 30 games finishing below the total, including most (9 of 12) of the games expected to finish with 60 total points or more.

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Posted on January 3, 2014

SportsMonday: The Bears Are Who We Thought They Were

By Jim Coffman

Tune in to WBEZ’s Afternoon Shift today around 2:45 to hear Jim Coffman talk Bears.
In the grand NFL scheme, Sunday’s Bears game meant nothing. Yes, it was aggravating to lose to Aaron Rodgers and the Packers again. And to do so with a division title and a spot in the playoffs on the line! What fun! But this Bears team was clearly not a championship contender.
Sunday’s game didn’t tell us anything we didn’t already know. Jay Cutler is good, not great. His inability to get himself and his offense started these last two games (several discouraging three-and-outs in the first halves of both) mirrored what had happened on numerous occasions earlier in the season. Then again, he has been better late in games and he does have significant value as an NFL quarterback.
The question of Cutler’s future is not binary, i.e., it is not a question of whether the Bears should keep him. We know at this point that Cutler will not win many big games by himself, i.e., he will not be a Rodgers-type player who so frequently pushes his team over the top in big games just with his own abilities.

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Posted on December 30, 2013

The College Football Report: The Bowls Drone On

By Mike Luce

Our bowl series continues.
Military Bowl Presented by Northrop Grumman
WINNER: WEIRDEST SPONSOR
Time: Friday, December 27, 2:30 p.m., ESPN (Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium, Annapolis, MD)
Teams: Marshall Thundering Herd (-2.5) vs. Maryland Terrapins
Forecast: Classified.
Comment: Northrop Grumman edged out Royal Purple as our 2013 winner for weirdest sponsor. The name (Military) and location (Annapolis) lends naturally to an armed forces-related endorsement, but a multibillion dollar defense contractor known for manufacturing drones seems like a politically tone-deaf choice. Formed in 2008 under the name “The Congressional Bowl” before signing EagleBank as a sponsor, the bowl tie-ins include Army (if eligible) against the #8 ACC team, with the #5 Conference USA team serving as a backup if the Black Knights don’t reach six wins. Thus, the Marshall-Maryland combination in 2013.

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Posted on December 27, 2013

We Regret The Errors

By Carl Mohrbacher

Definitely would have been more fun if Hawk Harrelson had called the game – you know, like driving is more fun when you’re doing whip-its.
You know, Stone Pony, I played on a pretty bad team in KC back in ’64, we were down 21 to nothin’ to the Philadelphia Mexicans that year on several occasions . . . several. We called ’em that because there was a guy named Tony Gonzalez playing center, but let me tell you sumthin’, We never put on such a poor display of athletics-ism as the Bears are dumpin’ out there right now. Never would have happened in KC . . . not while Manny “Dos Numeros” Jimenez was roaming left center. Wore number 15 and 20 that year, did Manny. We had four Mexican outfielders that year, if you counted me . . .
As I write this I’m beginning to believe that Hawk is just a slightly spryer version of Grandpa Simpson.
Thanks to excessive holiday Scotch intake, I’ve erased much of this game from my memory. By all accounts, the game was terrible.
“I thought we had a . . . game plan,” “said” Bears quarterback Jay Cutler, postgame. “Obviously, we didn’t . . . ”
‘Nuff said. Moving on.

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Posted on December 27, 2013

The College Football Report: HOT-N-READY

By Mike Luce

Our bowl series continues.
Little Caesars Pizza Bowl
Time: Thursday, December 26, 6 p.m., ESPN (Ford Field, Detroit)
Teams: Pittsburgh vs. Bowling Green (-7)
Forecast: Dough, followed by sauce and cheese
Comment: Mid-American Conference champions Bowling Green (10-3, 7-1 MAC) lost head coach Dave Clawson to Wake Forest following the close of the regular season, but look to be HOT-N-READY for this match-up versus the Panthers (6-6, 3-5 ACC). Despite a marginal regular-season record, Pittsburgh received a bowl bid by . . . well, we aren’t sure. The Little Caesars should host the #2 team from the MAC against the #8 Big Ten squad or, lacking the latter, an eligible (i.e. six or more wins) team from the Sun Belt, or (!) an at-large selection. Bowl organizers must have taken a pass on the likes of Texas State (6-6, 2-5 Sun Belt), in favor of the vaguely nearby Panthers.

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Posted on December 26, 2013

SportsMonday: Bears Stinks

By Jim Coffman

A lot of crap was written last week about how the Bears should consider using the franchise tag on Jay Cutler, thereby signing him to a contract that would pay him more than $16 million for the 2014 season alone. Come on! (And please believe me when I say I was saying that even before the debacle in Philly).
Questions abound about whether Cutler can stay healthy enough to lead a team to a championship and whether he is simply good enough to do so, and they have been out there way before the Bears embarrassed themselves 11-54 last night (I’m using the backwards score kind of the same way the military uses an upside down flag – to signal extreme distress).

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Posted on December 23, 2013

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