By Eric Emery
This week, President Obama traveled to Copenhagen to make a final Olympic plea. Who knows, maybe Obama can convince the voters to allow us to incur a needless and massive public debt. Obama might be that powerful. On the way home, perhaps Obama should stop at the following 0-3 football cities to solve their problems as well.
Charlotte: City in trouble after reports that the ongoing informational series called My Child Has WHAT? found to be more popular than the Panthers.
St. Louis: After buying Anheuser Busch, global beverage giant InBev offers St. Louis Rams management a six-pack of Stella Artois if they throw in the Rams. Obama to lobby Congress for $1.2 billion bailout counteroffer.
Miami: Obama announces ex-Dolphins fullback and Hall of Fame player Larry Csonka as the “Czar of Winning” for the city of Miami.
Cleveland: Obama to play Cleveland Cavaliers superstar LeBron James to one-on-one game. If he loses, James reassigned to play quarterback for the Browns.
Nashville: Following Franklin Delano Roosevelt’s example, Obama pushes for the “Tennessee Valley Authority Part II: The Search for a Win.”
Kansas City: Due to the poor play of the Chiefs and Royals, Obama quietly asks France to buy Kansas City back.
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OverHyped Game of the Week: Packers at Vikings
Storyline: Favre Green Bay, Favre Jets, Favre retired, Favre Vikings, Favre cured cancer.
Reality: Not since Bush-Cheney have two leaders done more to mess up the talent and goodwill they have, and find a way to lose when it counts.
Prediction: Packers Plus 3.5 Points, Over 45.5 Points Scored
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UnderHyped Game of the Week: Jets at Saints
Storyline: Both teams have a history of stinking. Both teams are 3-0. I guess this gives hope to all those other historically bad teams. We’re talking to you Chicago Cubs.
Reality: I think Milton Bradley plays on the Saints defense, because the Saints hate to hit.
Prediction: Saints Minus 7 Points, Over 45 Points Scored
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Record: 2-6
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For more Emery, please see the Blue & Orange Kool-Aid Report archives and the Over/Under collection. He welcomes your comments.
Posted on October 1, 2009