Chicago - A message from the station manager

Lou Piniella Outclassed

By Marty Gangler

You know a Cubs manager has had enough and is out the door when he starts whining about Steve Stone – who is almost always right. Lou Piniella is just the latest in a long line of baseball men who went up against the weight of Cubs history and the dysfunction of the organization and has come out on the losing end.


Week in Review: The Cubs lost two of three to Milwaukee and two of three to the White Sox in the neighborhood rivalry part of the schedule. Nice to know at least the Cubs are good neighbors so if you throw that loud party they won’t call the cops.
Week in Preview: The Cubs battle the state of California as the A’s and Angels come to town as interleague play continues. It’ll be nice to see pitchers we hardly ever see make the Cubs look pathetic at the plate – which we see all the time.
The Second Basemen Report: Six games and six starts by Ryan Theriot, who was supposed to have been benched. Paging Steve Stone.
In former second baseman news, we could really use all current second basemen to become former second basemen. How can we miss you if you aren’t gone?
The Zam Bomb: He’s no Steve Stone.
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Lost in Translation: Tyler-san Colvinieeo is Japanese for grab some bench.
Endorsement No-Brainer: BP for the Crosstown Classic.
Sweet and Sour Lou: 21% sweet, 79% sour. Lou is down 10 points on the Sweet-O-Meter due to his sudden realization that Steve Stone will still have a job once the season ends and he won’t. And just like your real crazy drunk uncle, Lou knows his days as the plant are numbered because he still fills out his TPS reports on paper instead of using the intranet, but he’s going to go down with guns blazing and tell everyone what he really thinks about them.
Ameritrade Stock Pick of the Week: The reinvigorated diaper sector looks like a strong buy, at least on the North Side.
Over/Under: The number of starts Tyler Colvin will get from here on out: +/- enough to show that Steve Stone was right.
Beachwood Sabermetrics: A complex algorithm performed by the The Cub Factor staff using all historical data made available by Major League Baseball has determined that all of the Cubs problems really come down to Steve Stone. At least that’s how Lou Piniella interprets the data.
Agony & Ivy: It’s a way of life.
The Cub Factor: Unlike Soriano, you can catch ’em all!
The White Sox Report: Now with a weekly Cubs Snub.
Fantasy Fix: Trade Strasburg!
The Mount Lou Alert System: Efforts to contain Mount Lou’s latest eruption were only aggravated by the involvement of BP, but second-guessing will not be tolerated.

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Posted on June 14, 2010