By Steve Rhodes and Thomas Chambers
Earlier this month WBEZ announced changes to its lineup described as the start of a five-year plan to bring more local programming to the station.
The Beachwood has obtained a confidential part of that plan outlining far more dramatic changes ahead than so far acknowledged. Let’s take a look.
6 a.m.: School Daze: Supt. Jean-Claude Brizard – or a paid stand-in – reads the day’s lunch menus, closings and turnarounds.
6:30 a.m.: Weather and Traffic on the Whines: Chicagoans whine about weather and traffic.
7 a.m.: Yuppie Worldviews: A daily rundown of First World Problems.
8 a.m.: Eight Forties At Eight: Gangstas do the news.
9 a.m.: Wait, Wait, Please Tell Me!: A daily review of the latest Freedom of Information Act requests denied by City Hall.
10 a.m.: Talk of the Gaytion: Live from Boystown Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays; from Andersonville on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
11 a.m.: Where’s Flatfoot? Find the beat cops as Rahm and Gerry shuffle the deck again. Tweet ’em if you see ’em.
Noon: More About Chicago Pizzas & Hot Dogs: Hosted by Mike North because we can’t help ourselves. With Terry Savage crunching the numbers.
1 p.m.: Buckshot! The Michael Sneed Outdoors Show.
2 p.m.: Stale Air: Daily reports from our Pilsen and Little Village bureaus.
3 p.m.: Click and Clack: Officials from the Chicago Taxi Drivers Union take your questions.
4 p.m.: The Wacky Groupon Variety Hour: Andrew Mason reads the day’s best Groupons on the air and you laugh uproariously at how hilarious they are.
5 p.m.: A Few Things Endlessly Reconsidered: Repeating the same media narratives for the millionth time.
6 p.m.: Ain’t It A Shame: Meditations about how somebody should really help the poor.
7 p.m.: Today in Aldermanic Expense Reports. In conjunction with the Chicago News Cooperative.
7:30 p.m.: Hail Rahm! An hour of aldermen praising Rahm Emanuel for acknowledging their existence.
8 p.m.: TIF, TIF, TSK, TSK: Hosted by Ben Joravsky.
8:30 p.m.: We Hear They’re Great: Reviewing five-star Chicago restaurants you’ll never get to go to.
9 p.m.: The Best of Pledge Drive. Our most effective pleas aggregated for your convenience.
9:30 p.m.: Ask Tom Why. Philosophical explorations with Tom Skilling.
10 pm.: North Shore Nannies. Inside Chicagoland’s most ostentatious nurseries.
10:30 p.m.: From Wilmette to Winnetka: An audio review of the day on WTTW.
11 p.m.: This American Muslim Life: Hosted by Ibrahim Gulab.
Midnight to 6 a.m.: Vocalo. Nobody’s listening anyway.
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Comments welcome.
Posted on January 30, 2012