Chicago - A message from the station manager

Barista! Even Blended Frozen Drinks Cannot Bring Me Down

By Maude Perkins

Enough exasperation. Spring is a-titillating, I am playful as a pup, and work has been full of random delights.
* I was deemed a “wise and wonderful barista” by a customer whom I had never seen before. I was genuinely touched by her compliment, as it is rare to have your sensitivity to detail acknowledged. Too bad my district manager wasn’t in earshot – you know, the one who thinks my personality sucks.
* Said district manager dropped by the store for her monthly visit, once again reminding us that nothing good ever visits monthly. Besides National Geographic.


Amidst her all-day store occupancy, two gentlemen spent a couple hours chatting in the chairs next to the table where she and my manager were parked. Well into their stay, one of the men came up to Velma and me and asked who the woman at the table was. Our district manager! we told him. “I have been listening to her talk for over an hour and she is the most self-centered, egotistical person I have ever heard,” he replied. “Between how she speaks to your manager and her cell phone conversations . . . she is awful. And I would tell her that if I wasn’t afraid that it would get your manager in trouble. I feel bad for you guys that you have to answer to her.”
Another perceptive customer! These people are coming out of nowhere with their sharp observations! Must be the all the sunshine – vitamins and what have you. I am really starting to like these customer people. Maybe I have horribly misjudged. I mean, Refill Bandit and I have resolved our differences, despite all odds and my former undying hatred towards him. And just the other day, a mom of two picked up every last Lego after her mildly cute, yet still grubby children were finished ornamenting the store with the pegged plastic primary colors. I maintain hope yet.
* Velma and I had a great close one stormy night, with the help of Tina Turner. We both sweat our balls off rolling that shit down the river at full volume. I swear I was a voluptuous R&B back-up singer in a previous life. Or a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader, depending on how much hair I am dancing with and how much on-pitch singing actually gets accomplished during said hair-dancing.
So I actually had a spirit-renewing week. Sure, there were the usual moments of dark, ill-humored customers, but I can’t say anything particularly odious occurred. I know there were many blended frozen drinks, but I can’t say I ever snarled when one was ordered. What can I say? The sun does weird things to people. Even me.
*
Maude Perkins is The Beachwood Reporter‘s pseudononymous service industry affairs editor currently serving time as a store supervisor for a large, publicly-held corporate coffee chain. Catch up with the rest of her heartwarming tales from the front here.

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Posted on March 26, 2007