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The [Monday] Papers

By Steve Rhodes

“The tally of former Chicago Housing Authority employees in positions paying $85,000 to $195,000 at the Illinois tollway is growing, and that concerns some lawmakers given the top tollway executive also is a CHA alumnus,” the Daily Herald reports.
“Tollway leaders dismissed questions of nepotism when asked about nine ex-CHA staffers who were hired from August through December and are paid more than $1.3 million collectively, state records show. Executive Director Jose Alvarez, the former CHA chief operating officer, joined the tollway in April.

“Taken together, all nine of these employees have decades of experience at a number of different organizations in human resources, talent recruitment, procurement and compliance,” tollway spokesman Dan Rozek said.

Dan Rozek is a former Sun-Times reporter, so that makes him Today’s Worst Person In Illinois, edging out his boss, Jose Alvarez.

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Posted on February 10, 2020

The [Friday] Papers

By Steve Rhodes

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Posted on February 7, 2020

The [Thursday] Papers

By Steve Rhodes

“Chicago-based Turtle Wax continues to make its hometown shine at the 2020 Chicago Auto Show,” the company says in a press release.
“As the exclusive car care sponsor of the 2020 Chicago Auto Show, held Feb. 8-17 at McCormick Place, Turtle Wax will keep the nearly 1,000 vehicles on display shining their best and spotlight its latest innovation, Turtle Wax Hybrid Solutions, with product demonstrations as well special events in its engaging exhibit all show long.”
I only bring you this scintillating news because it reminded me of the first joke I kind of purposely wrote, rather than just said in the moment. I was in high school, and me and a friend did a comedy open mic. The joke was this:

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Posted on February 6, 2020

The [Monday] Papers

By Steve Rhodes

Natasha Julius’s post-game post-script to her 12th Annual (More Or Less) Beachwood Super Bowl Halftime Show Prop Bet:
“I’m not sure there’s much to add, but I will say for a halftime show sponsored by a major soft drink manufacturer, JLo sure seemed thirsty. Also, to complete the record, I will note that two Reggaeton stars performed and neither was Pitbull, which I think we can all agree was a rare win for humanity. I’ll add that Shakira performed with Bad Bunny, who is from Puerto Rico, while JLo performed with J Balvin from Colombia and I find that genuinely charming, like they were trying to pretend this wasn’t a huge open-air diva fight to which JLo brought her crotch while Shakira brought a guitar, a backup band, a flipping drum set and several hundred adorable children. I’m not going to say who won (Shakira) but I’m pretty sure someone (Shakira) wound up clad in gold while some other basic Betty (not Shakira) wound up in silver. It was Shakira, guys. Shakira won.”

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Posted on February 3, 2020

The [Thursday] Papers

By Steve Rhodes

“Interim Chicago police Superintendent Charlie Beck unveiled a massive restructuring Thursday that will move hundreds of detectives and narcotics and gang officers from specialized units to police districts in a bid to bring added resources and better coordination to combating violence,” the Tribune reports.
“The reorganization also creates a new office to carry out policing reforms required by a federal consent decree – headed by the highest-ranking African American woman in the department’s history.”
If history is any guide, hundreds of officers will be moved back to specialized units in a few years to better combat violence. But creating a new office to carry out reforms required by the consent decree is probably a good thing, though ultimately it will be up to the new permanent chief and the rank-and-file to embrace reform.
One thing is for certain, though: Beck is not merely a caretaker police chief. To some degree, at least, he’s a reformer who is sympatico with Mayor Lori Lightfoot and he’s laying the groundwork for the next chief that should get some difficult decisions out of the way and smooth the path for his successor (who just might end up being his pal Sean Malinowski).

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Posted on January 30, 2020

The [Wednesday] Papers

By Steve Rhodes

“A Chicago Police training exercise next to Whitney Young High School caused the school to go on lockdown Tuesday during finals when students spotted a gunman outside, the school’s principal told parents,” Block Club Chicago reports.
Apparently the school hadn’t been told there would be a drill next door.
“[Principal Joyce] Kenner, in an e-mail to parents, said three students spotted a gunman outside the school, under a nearby bridge. She then put the prestigious selective enrollment school on lockdown.”

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Posted on January 29, 2020

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