By Zay N. Smith
News Item: “Valentine’s Day spending is projected to reach $18.6 billion this year, with men expected to spend more than women–an average of $175.61 versus $89. . . .”
So, OK, men, in that moment that comes after exchanging gifts, lean over and whisper gently in her ear:
“You owe me $86.61.”
She’ll laugh.
She really will.
News Headline: “Obama continues Bush practice of shredding the Constitution.”
We find bipartisanship where we can.
News Headline: “Asteroid to make close pass at Earth next week.”
Physicist Edward T. Lu regarding the countdown for Asteroid 2012 DA14, which will pass closer than the orbits of some artificial satellites in seven days:
“For every one we know about, there are about 100 more we don’t know about. We have to find the other 99.”
Pssst.
Asteroid 2013 CY32 was discovered yesterday–two days after it passed closer than the orbits of some artificial satellites.
Found one.
News Headline: “Bones under parking lot belong to Richard III.”
Stephen J. Smith, a Minneapolis reader, writes:
“No one, apparently, had a hunch he’d be back.”
It was an undignified end for Richard III, moldering under all those parked cars.
Especially the tudors.
News Headline: “Library gives free pole-dancing lessons to boost attendance.”
Which reminds QT:
National Young Readers Week this year starts Nov. 11.
Which leaves you 276 days to find one.
Lest We Forget that the Dark Ages Were a Faith-Based Initiative:
There are now more than 300 private schools in the United States receiving public voucher funds and teaching Old Testament creationism in science classes.
News Headline: “Paul Ryan: ‘I’ve ‘decided not to decide’ on presidential run.”
Ryan’s The Path to Prosperity: A Blueprint for American Renewal has slipped from 280,344th to 315,993rd on the Amazon best-seller list, for those keeping track.
The Case for Zero Tolerance of Modern School Administrators:
A 7-year-old boy in Loveland, Colo., was suspended for violating his school’s weapons policy when at recess he threw an imaginary grenade at an imaginary box that had something evil inside and made a grenade noise.
QT Economic Indicator and Sign of the Times of the Week:
Nearly 200 workers are being laid off by the Illinois Department of Employment Security.
News Headline: “Cell phone user allegedly choked by theatergoer in Sarasota’s Performing Arts Center.”
Yes. But is there a downside?
From the QT Archive of Knowledge:
+ Ayn Rand was pro-choice.
+ Al Gore is richer than Mitt Romney.
News Headline: “Outgoing Transportation Secretary LaHood: ‘America is one big pothole.’ ”
There we go.
Always disparaging America.
Make that the greatest pothole in the world.
From Poor QT’s Almanack:
Philosopher Martin Buber, who wrote, “Inscrutably involved, we live in the currents of universal reciprocity,” was born 135 years ago on the eighth day of National Bake for Family Fun Month.
QT Grammar R Us Seminar on the English Language:
R.M., a Chicago reader, regarding QT’s wondering what comes before suprapreantepenultimate, which comes before preantepenultimate, which comes before antepenultimate, which comes before penultimate, which comes before ultimate, writes:
“Hemidemisemiquaversuperantepenultimate.”
And on that note. . . .
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Posted on February 8, 2013