Chicago - A message from the station manager

Learning To Walk Instead Of Crawling

By Marty Gangler

Was it me or did that four-game series with the Reds feel like it took a month? It didn’t even feel like that long of a week at the old day job.
Lost in those long four days, though, was a gem of a comment made by Bob Brenly. He said something to the fact that Joey Votto of the Reds has more walks than four Cubs starters combined. So I took a look and did some math.
Votto has 106 walks while Marlon Byrd (24), A-Ram (42), Darwin Barney (19), and Starlin Castro (33) have a combined 118. How pathetic.
With this in mind, we here at The Cub Factor thought it might be wise to make a list of a few things we would like General Manager X to do/be aware of as he comes in:


Go see Moneyball. Not only is it supposed to be good, but Jonah Hill is trying to be a dramatic actor. Let’s see if he’s got the chops.
If a player is clearly your best hitter, make the manager bat him third. It took Quade most of the season before he put A-Ram in the 3-hole. I’m not even an A-ram fan, but still.
If you have a guy batting .320, make the manager keep playing him until he doesn’t bat .320 anymore. Why Reed Johnson doesn’t play every day makes no sense.
Wins are more important than being a good guy. If you can trade guys like Kerry Wood and Ryan Dempster to make your team better, then do it. Really change the lovable loser culture.
Distance yourself from everything “Cub.” There is no reason to embrace the horrible past. Let’s all move on and say things like “That guy didn’t win anything, let’s not make another statue.”

Week in Review: The Cubs went 3-4 for the week, losing three of four to the Reds and winning two of three from the Astros. At least we are one week closer to General Manager X.
The Week in Preview: The Cubs stay home for three against the Brewers and then travel to St Louis for three vs. the Cards. I’m sure the schedule-makers thought these games might mean something at the end of the season vs. division rivals, but the only one that it means something for is Mike Quade.
The Second Basemen Report: Darwin Barney got six starts this week; Blake DeWitt got the other one. Quade must have thought Barney was getting tired of being mediocre and had to give him a rest for a day. Which was just like Jim Hendry drew up.
In former second basemen news, Joey Amalfitano last played second base for the Cubs in 1967. He last managed for the Cub in 1981. His height is listed at 5’10” but he seemed shorter to me. He is missed.
The Zam Bomb: Big Z will continue to be apologetic or angry or somewhere in between all to himself this season.
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Marlon Byrd Supplemental Report: Conte has been injecting Marlon with “lost season.”
Lost in Translation: Kosuke-san Fukudome is Japanese for pretty much the same regardless what team he plays for.
Endorsement No-Brainer: Ryan Dempster for hourglasses. Because his time is up.
Sweet and Sour Quade: 12% sweet, 88% sour. Mike jumped up another two points this week due to managing like his job is on the line. And just like your thought-to-be well-adjusted uncle, after Mike was let go from the cannery he would still show up every morning and wait outside as if they would change their minds and ask him to come in and can some fish.
Ameritrade Stock Pick of the Week: Shares of Beer and Cheese should trade lower this week as our friends to the north come down and rub in their good team in our faces.
Over/Under: The number of “Brewer blue” shirts in the crowd this week: +/- more than anyone wants.
Beachwood Sabermetrics: A complex algorithm performed by The Cub Factor staff using all historical data made available by Major League Baseball has determined that walks are not overrated.
Farm Report: “The Tennessee Smokies lost to the Mobile BayBears (Diamondbacks), 6-4,” Bleed Cubbie Blue reports. “This means that the BayBears have won the Southern League Championship, three games to one. It’s the third straight season that the Smokies have lost the Southern League Championship in four games . . .
“This is the end of the minor league season for the Cubs farm system.”
It continues for the big-league club for a couple more weeks, however.
The Cub Factor: Unlike Soriano, you can catch ’em all!
The White Sox Report: Know the enemy.
Mike Quade Status Update: “The topic of statistics this time of year first came up with Mike Quade last week when the Cubs’ manger said he’d do whatever he could to help starter Ryan Dempster reach 200 innings pitched,” ESPN Chicago reports.
Because personal goals are more important than team needs. It’s the Kubs Way.
Well-Adjusted / Delirious / High
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Posted on September 19, 2011