By Natasha Julius
Market Update
Humor analysts today expressed optimism that the longest laugh drought since the Cuban Missile Crisis could soon be eased. It seems one of Europe’s chief suppliers is poised to release an extra 1 million barrels of rape jokes each day until the crisis has passed.
Presidential Premonitions?
Do you suppose when George W. Bush looked into the eyes of his beloved Pootie-Poot and got a “sense of his soul”, it looked anything like this? Or this? Or maybe this? Because if not, we’re thinking the Boomer-in-Chief might be showing his age a bit.
Backseat Squabbles
So this year’s road trip to peace is going to be just like all the others. North Korea is going to keep sucking up to China and Japan in the front seat while making ugly faces at America the whole time. And then, just when you think Uncle Jim is going to stick up for the States, he actually tells us we should make nice with Syria and Iran just so Iraq can get some sleep in the back seat. This is going to be the worst election season ever!
Rock Around the Cloak
American scientists this week announced they have developed an invisibility cloak apparently based on Saddam Hussein’s cast-offs. We’re pretty sure we know who gets to wear it first, too.
Every Old Film is New Again . . .
Oh, Harrison. We’ve been through this before.
Posted on October 20, 2006