By Stephanie B Goldberg
1. RIP, Bratz. I, for one, am going to miss all four of these anime-eyed Pussycat Dolls that inspired their very own American Psychological Association Task Force to investigate their effects on young girls.
And who can forget Bratz: The Movie, with Jon Voight’s Oscar-worthy performance as Principal Dimly? Or those killjoys,
the National Child’s Labor Committee, who claim that Bratz are manufactured in a Chinese sweatshop where women work a 94.5 hour work for $.52 an hour. And perky little Karaoke Jade Bratz, who dropped something that sounded a lot like the F-bomb*, to the consternation of parents everywhere. Next: Little Miss Trailer Trash.
*
–
2. Speaking of dolls, the fashion world is eager to play Barbie with Michelle Obama, second-guessing her duds for the January inaugural. This is soooooo sexist – I mean, doesn’t anybody care what Barack will wear? I have a suggestion if he decides not to go black tie.
3. Wondering what to bring to your office potluck? It takes balls to serve something like this.
And how about a side of Dancer, Prancer and Blitzen?
4. Bail out the Big 3? Oh, why not. And, to quote John McCain, I know just how to do it: Buy them a year’s supply of lottery tickets.
5. It’s official: Spencer Pratt says he did not drug Heidi Montag into marrying him. And why the hell do I know who Heidi and Spencer are when I’ve never watched their lamebrained show? I accidentally learned about them while reading loftier subject matter, like Gordon Ramsay’s extramarital affairs.
Posted on December 5, 2008