By Marty Gangler
So this is what a slump feels like when your team is still really good.
Can’t say that the Cubs themselves and the fans didn’t need some reality in their lives. Week after week of insane record-breaking or matching or last times since 1907ing was starting to feel really weird.
Like, let’s just have a good year, get completely healthy come October and stay a good six to 10 games in front of everyone in the division and we can call it a good season and take our chances in the payoffs.
The pressure will be enormous anyway, why tack on the extra burden of an insanely good record and all of that? Not sure if it would matter, but yeah, I’m kinda OK not lighting the baseball world on fire and just cruising to the playoffs.
But first things first, these guys need to get out of this slump. With this in mind we here at The Cub Factor have come up with a few slump-buster options for the 2016 season:
* Pin the appendage on Clark contest.
* Sign even more catchers. Looks like old standby Koyie Hill might be available.
* Crazy hat-wearing contest.
* Create your own natural disaster.
* Just get hammered in the beer garden which is not just a beer garden.
* Old school.
Week in Review: The Cubs went 2-4 for the week, losing two of three to both the Brewers and Giants. Not a good week. But they at least beat Dusty’s Nationals a while back and, yeah, I’m still happy about that because I hate him a lot.
Week in Preview: The boys in blue head to St. Louis for three with the Cardinals before coming home for a weekend set with the Phillies. I’ll be going to the game on Friday and I’m looking forward to seeing how things are progressing down there. Well, I’ll mostly be thinking, I remember when I actually remembered what the place and surrounding area looked like. As someone who always uses landmarks to get around, I’m sure I’ll be pretty confused. If you are watching on TV, I’ll be the guy without the W flag, and in the Shooter 47 jersey.
Musical Outfielders: And no, we aren’t talking about Matt Szczur playing the French horn. Hey, look who decided to show up? George Sun got five starts this week in left and made the most out of them. He even didn’t totally suck in the outfield (I think he should of caught that one on Sunday night though). Kris Bryant got the other two starts in left. And now Szczur is back and Jason Heyward is a little dinged up. So the music will not be stopping anytime soon.
Former Annoying Cub of the Week: In 2006 the Cubs took Tyler Colvin in the first round. That kinda didn’t work out. He was never annoying per se, but he was just one of the up-and-coming guys who came and went. I do sort of feel bad for guys like Colvin these days. He’d be a perfect Brewer right now; a cheap guy who is OK and is a slot taker-upper while you tank your season. He could have probably stuck around for a bit longer these days in baseball, but yeah, he is not missed.
Current Annoying Cub of the Week: I’m growing a bit tired of seeing Tim Federowicz coming up in big spots. Or any spots, really. I know the third catcher is supposed to be a defense-first guy but, wait, is there a rule on what the third catcher is supposed to be? So far his OBP is .217 for the season, and his listed weight is 215. So after a trip to the buffet table or the soft serve machine, he will probably weigh more than his OBP. Not so good. We already have a defense only/extra coach/old man mascot on the team in David Ross. And Ross’s hitting this season is already a bonus, so yeah, I’m not so jacked up about this Federowicz deal.
Mad(don) Scientist: Big Poppa Joe just couldn’t shut up about George Sun. He even went as so far to say that he saw a major league player out there. And well, I mean, Jorge is a major league player kind of already. He is on a team in the major leagues and really that’s all the criteria you need to technically be a major league player. But sure, I’m picking up on what Joe is putting down. He’s playing the long game with Jorge and pumping him up. It’s a bit transparent, but it’s never a bad thing to give guys a pat on the back like that. Joe seems to know what he is doing.
Kubs Kalender: Fans attending the Phillies game at Wrigley on Friday in the bleachers will receive a ’90s visor from Budweiser. I lived through the ’90s and I can’t remember owning a visor. I also can’t remember drinking a Budweiser. Sure, I was right out of high school, but it was painters’ caps and Old Style the whole way (although I think painters’ caps were more of an ’80s thing).
Beachwood Sabermetrics: A complex algorithm performed by The Cub Factor staff using all historical data made available by Major League Baseball has determined that it’ll be hard to keep your wallet closed in Rickettsville.
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Marty Gangler is The Cub Factor. He welcomes your comments.
Posted on May 23, 2016