The Democrats, Episode 4
The Democratic presidential candidates met at The Citadel in Charleston, South Carolina on Monday night for the first YouTube debate featuring questions from citizens via YouTube videos, because The Citadel is apparently known for embracing change and innovation. As always, your Beachwood Debate Theater team of Andrew Kingsford, Tim Willette, and Steve Rhodes were on hand at Beachwood HQ to provide expert commentary. This transcript has been edited for length, clarity, and sanity.
*
ANDERSON COOPER, CNN host: Our first question tonight is Zach Kempf in Provo, Utah.
QUESTION: What’s up? I’m running out of tape; I have to hurry. So my question is: We have a bunch of leaders who can’t seem to do their job. And we pick people based on the issues they that they represent, but then they get in power and they don’t do anything about it anyway.
You’re going to spend this whole night talking about your views on issues, but the issues don’t matter if when you get in power nothing’s going to get done.
I mean, be honest with us. How are you going to be any different?
SEN. CHRISTOPHER DODD: First of all, thank you for inviting us here in The Citadel. It’s great to be here at this wonderful college, university.
Certainly, I think it’s a very important question one ought to be asking because, while hope and confidence and optimism are clearly very important, I think experience matters a great deal.
STEVE: Snap! on Obama.
DODD: I’m very proud of the fact that, over my 26 years in the Senate, I’ve authored landmark legislation, the Family and Medical Leave Act, child care legislation, reform of financial institutions.
TIM: Dude, isn’t it true all politicians are robots?
COOPER: But if someone really wants a change, are you the guy to give it to them?
DODD: Well, I think they ought to look back. Speeches are easy to make and rhetoric is easy to expose here.
STEVE: He’s trying for the ‘Dodd Attacks Obama’ headline.
TIM: I think my experience bears out that I will be the change candidate. We don’t want some new guy coming along and talking about change.
* * *
QUESTION: Hello. My name is Davis Fleetwood. I’m from Groton, Massachusetts. Congressman Kucinich, how would America be better off with you as president than we would be if either Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama became president?
REP. DENNIS KUCINICH: I’ll never send you in pursuit of a political agenda or a lie.
OBAMA: [P]art of the reason I don’t take PAC money, I don’t take federal lobbyists’ money is because we’ve got to get the national interests up front as opposed to the special interests.
STEVE: He does take money from lobbyists.
* * *
QUESTION: Hi. My name is Rob Porter, and I’m from Irvine, California. Mrs. Clinton, how would you define the word “liberal?” And would you use this word to describe yourself?
CLINTON: I prefer the word “progressive” . . .
STEVE: The Democrats are co-opting that word. It used to mean people to the left of mainstream liberalism – the left wing of the party and beyond.
COOPER: Senator Gravel, are you a liberal?
FORMER SEN. MIKE GRAVEL: I wouldn’t use either word. Zach asked about change. You’re not going to see any change when these people get elected.
We were asked about – that we’re united. We’re not united. I’m not united on many of their views. And I want to take on Barack Obama for a minute, who said he doesn’t take money from lobbyists. Well, he has 134 bundlers. Now, what does he think that is?
And, besides that, he has received money from a Robert Wolf, the head of the UBS bank in the United States, who raised $195,000 – from this bank – wait a second – who has lobbyists in Washington . . .
COOPER: Senator Obama, I’m going to have to let you respond.
OBAMA: Absolutely.
Well, the fact is I don’t take PAC money and I don’t take lobbyists’ money.
STEVE: That’s a lie.
OBAMA: And the bundlers – the reason you know who is raising money for me, Mike, is because I have pushed through a law this past session to disclose that.
STEVE: But he’s against bundling, even though he does it.
* * *
QUESTION: If you had to pick any Republican . . .
ANDREW: . . . to be on your baseball team . . .
QUESTION: . . . to be your running mate, who would it be?
SEN. JOE BIDEN: Chuck Hagel, and I’d consider asking Dick Lugar to be secretary of state.
FORMER SEN. JOHN EDWARDS: Chuck Hagel is a good choice. But . . . Do you believe that compromise, triangulation will bring about big change?
STEVE: He gestured to Hillary when he said that.
EDWARDS: I think the people who are powerful in Washington – big insurance companies, big drug companies, big oil companies — they are not going to negotiate. They are not going to give away their power. The only way that they are going to give away their power is if we take it away from them. And I have been standing up to these people my entire life. I have been fighting them my entire life in court rooms – and beating them.
ANDREW: What you need is a lawyer!
* * *
COOPER: We’ve asked each campaign to put together a 30- second YouTube-style video. The first one is from Senator Chris Dodd.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
QUESTION: Senator, I have to ask, what’s with the white hair?
DODD: I don’t know why you bring that up. Bill Richardson, Hillary, Joe Biden and I, we’re all about the same age. I don’t think the white hair is an issue.
QUESTION: Well, how did you get the white hair?
DODD: Hard work, I suppose. Central America and bring peace to Northern Ireland. I’m ready to be president.
BEACHWOOD MYSTERY DEBATE TEAM: [groans, eye-rolling]
DODD: I’m Chris Dodd, and we approved this message.
STEVE: Regretfully.
COOPER: There you go. Nothing wrong with white hair.
DODD: A young person with white hair, too?
COOPER: Yes, sadly, my age is catching up to my hair.
(LAUGHTER)
ANDREW: Oooh, another zinger from the Boy Wonder!
* * *
QUESTION: This is Will from Boston, Massachusetts. Will African-Americans ever going to get reparations for slavery?
EDWARDS: I’m not for reparations.
OBAMA: I think the reparations we need right here in South Carolina is investment, for example, in our schools.
ANDREW: So I’m going to dodge the question.
OBAMA: We’ve got to understand that there are corridors of shame all across the country.
STEVE: And they’re lined with buildings owned by Tony Rezko.
TIM: I like ‘Corridors of Shame.’
STEVE: It’s a good band name.
TIM: Scrubbing the Corridors of Shame.
STEVE: It drops July 25th.
COOPER: Is anyone on the stage for reparations for slavery for African-Americans?
KUCINICH: I am. The Bible says we shall be and must be repairers of the breach.
STEVE: The breach caused by religion.
KUCINICH We need to have a country which recognizes that there is an inequality of opportunity and a president who’s ready to challenge the interest groups – be they insurance companies or mortgage companies or defense contractors who are taking the money away from the people who need it.
STEVE: Democrats always talk like they’re going to challenge all of these big powerful institutions and when they get in office it never happens.
TIM: But he would. That’s why he’ll never get elected.
* * *
QUESTION: [From Morgan, lounging on her bed] Do you believe the response in the wake of Hurricane Katrina would have been different if the storm hit an affluent, predominantly white city?
STEVE: And if you want to see more of me, just go to morgandoesdebates.com and have a credit card ready!
DODD: Well, it’s a great question, Morgan, to raise here. It, obviously, points to one of the most dark and shameful moments in recent past history in our country – the fact that a major American city went through a natural disaster, and we found almost little to do. The American president had almost no response whatsoever to the people of that city, New Orleans.
In fact, today still, the problem persists where people who had to move out of their city, move elsewhere, and little or no efforts to make sure they can get back in their homes. They have literally thousands of people whose homes were destroyed, their economic opportunities destroyed . . .
STEVE: We know! We know it! Katrina sucks! We’ve heard!
TIM: Water was everywhere! It was, uh, leaking into houses! People were stuck in that dome, remember that?
ANDREW: With no air conditioning!
* * *
GOV. BILL RICHARDSON: Well, there was politics. All of a sudden, other states that had the similar devastation got better treatment, like Mississippi.
ANDREW: What happened to his tan?
STEVE: He’s in South Carolina.
ANDREW: Oh yeah.
STEVE: The last debate was at Howard.
ANDREW: Pure coincidence.
STEVE: He’s so bad.
* * *
QUESTION: Hello. My name is Jordan Williams, and I am a student at K.U., from Coffeyville, Kansas. Whenever I read an editorial about one of you, the author never fails to mention the issue of race or gender, respectively. Either one is not authentically black enough, or the other is not satisfactorily feminine. How will you address these critics and their charges if one or both of you should end up on the Democratic ticket in ’08?
OBAMA: You know, when I’m catching a cab in Manhattan . . .
STEVE: He’s used that line before.
TIM: Because it never gets old.
STEVE: When’s the last time he caught a cab in Manhattan?
OBAMA: . . . in the past, I think I’ve given my credentials.
STEVE: He has black credentials. Unless he left them back at the hotel.
ANDREW: Hillary’s married to a black guy.
STEVE: Wouldn’t it have been better if he responded to the feminine part of the question? I am too woman enough! When I’m in a boardroom trying to raise money in Manhattan . . .
* * *
COOPER: Senator Clinton, you have a minute as well since this question is to you.
CLINTON: Well, I couldn’t run as anything other than a woman . . . And when I’m inaugurated, I think it’s going to send a great message to a lot of little girls and boys around the world.
ANDREW: Eh, I’m sure a lot of little girls and boys around the world are waiting with baited breath.
CLINTON: You know, I have spent my entire life advocating for women. I went to Beijing in 1995 . . .
ANDREW: As a woman.
STEVE: Elizabeth Edwards should run. We always get the wrong spouse.
* * *
QUESTION: Hi. My name is Mary.
QUESTION: And my name is Jen.
QUESTION: And we’re from Brooklyn, New York. If you were elected president of the United States, would you allow us to be married [pause] to each other?
ANDREW: Didn’t see that one coming.
STEVE: Obama wouldn’t.
KUCINICH: Mary and Jen, the answer to your question is yes. And let me tell you why.
ANDREW: Because I’m Dennis Kucinich, goddamit!
KUCINICH: Because if our Constitution really means what it says . . .
ANDREW: Where’s the polygamist?
STEVE: He’s Republican.
ANDREW: Oh yeah, that’s right.
* * *
QUESTION: I’m Reverend Reggie Longcrier. I’m the pastor of Exodus Mission and Outreach Church in Hickory, North Carolina. Senator Edwards said his opposition to gay marriage is influenced by his Southern Baptist background. Most Americans agree it was wrong and unconstitutional to use religion to justify slavery, segregation, and denying women the right to vote. So why is it still acceptable to use religion to deny gay American their full and equal rights?
TIM: Reggie!
ANDREW: Damn!
EDWARDS: [P]ersonally have been on a journey on this issue. I feel enormous conflict about it.
COOPER: The reverend is actually in the audience tonight. Where is he? Right over here.
STEVE: Reggie!
ANDREW: Ooh! Ooh!
COOPER: Why is it okay to quote religious beliefs when talking about why you don’t support something?
EDWARDS: It’s not. I mean, I’ve been asked a personal question . . .
STEVE: It’s not personal, it’s policy!
EDWARDS: I think it is absolutely wrong, as president of the United States, for me to have used that faith basis as a basis for denying anybody their rights, and I will not do that when I’m president of the United States.
ANDREW: I’ll find plenty of legal excuses without bringing the church into it.
COOPER: Senator Obama, the laws banning interracial marriage in the United States were ruled unconstitutional in 1967. What is the difference between a ban on interracial marriage and a ban on gay marriage?
OBAMA: Well, I think that it is important to pick up on something that was said earlier by both Dennis and by Bill, and that is that we’ve got to make sure that everybody is equal under the law. And the civil unions that I proposed would be equivalent in terms of making sure that all the rights that are conferred by the state are equal for same-sex couples as well as for heterosexual couples.
ANDREW: Super civil unions!
STEVE: Equal but seperate under the law!
OBAMA Now, with respect to marriage, it’s my belief that it’s up to the individual denominations to make a decision as to whether they want to recognize marriage or not.
STEVE Not everyone gets married in a church.
TIM: We don’t care what churches want to do! That’s what they do now!
STEVE: Civil unions for black people!
COOPER: Before we go we’re going to show another candidate video. This one is from the Clinton campaign. And then when we come back from the break, we’ll see one from the – from Senator Edwards’ campaign.
(MUSIC PLAYED FROM CLINTON CAMPAIGN VIDEO)
STEVE: That was terrible.
TIM: The pump don’t work ’cause the vandals took the handle.
STEVE: I was thinking that too.
(EDWARDS CAMPAIGN VIDEO to the tune of “Hair”)
STEVE: Defensive, but well-produced.
* * *
QUESTION: I’m Gabriel. And I’m Connie, from a refugee camp near Darfur. What action do you commit to that will get these children back home to a safe Darfur?
COOPER: Governor Richardson, what are you going to do?
ANDREW: Bus tickets for everyone!
* * *
COOPER: Senator Biden, in the past, you’ve talked about NATO troops. What about American troops?
BIDEN: Absolutely, positively. Look, I’m so tired of this. Let’s get right to it. I heard the same arguments after I came back from meeting with Milosevic: We can’t act; we can’t send troops there. Where we can, America must. Why Darfur? Because we can. We should now. Those kids will be dead by the time the diplomacy is over.
(APPLAUSE)
I’m not joking. I’ve been to that camp. I walked through that camp. You know what happened when I landed? When I landed and the dust settled, a young African aid worker came up to me and he looked at me and he said, “Thank you. Thank you, America, for coming.” You don’t understand – they don’t understand. They think we can save them.
COOPER: Senator Clinton, would you agree with Senator Biden? American troops should got to Darfur?
CLINTON: I agree completely that what we need to do is start acting instead of talking.
That means accelerating the United Nations peacekeeping forces along with the African Union. It means moving more quickly on divestment and sanctions on the Sudanese government, including trying to use the diplomacy to get China involved.
And, finally, it does mean a no-fly zone. We can do it in a way that doesn’t endanger humanitarian relief.
COOPER: How about American troops on the ground?
CLINTON: I think NATO has to be there with the no-fly zone, and I think that only the United States can provide the logistical support and the air lift to make a no-fly zone and the actual delivery of humanitarian aid work.
COOPER: Just in the spirit of trying to get the answer, does that mean no American ground troops?
CLINTON: American ground troops I don’t think belong in Darfur at this time. I think we need to focus on the United Nations peacekeeping troops and the African Union troops.
We’ve got to figure out what we’re doing in Iraq, where our troops are stretched thin, and Afghanistan, where we’re losing the fight to al-Qaeda and bin Laden.
* * *
COOPER: OK, want to talk about Iraq tonight. Before we do, I just want to put a picture up on the screen. That’s United States Marine Corps 1st Lieutenant Shane Chiders. He was a 2001 graduate of this college, The Citadel. March 1st, 2003, it was just after sunrise when Lieutenant Chiders and his platoon were on a mission to capture an oil pumping station from Iraqi soldiers before the Iraqi soldiers could destroy it. During the operation, a stray bullet hit him just below his body armor. Lieutenant Chiders became the first U.S. service man to die inside Iraq in Operation Iraqi Freedom.
QUESTION: Mitch from Philadelphia. My question for all the candidates: How do we pull out now? I mean, do you leave a newborn baby to take care of himself? How do we pull out now?
OBAMA: Look, I opposed this war from the start. Because I anticipated that we would be creating the kind of sectarian violence that we’ve seen and that it would distract us from the war on terror.
COOPER: Right . . .
OBAMA: I’m going to get to the question, Anderson.
ANDREW: I’m just not gonna answer it.
At this point, I think we can be as careful getting out as we were careless getting in.
STEVE: Aargh, he’s used that line before too. He should get a second job writing ad jingles.
OBAMA: But we have to send a clear message to the Iraqi government as well as to the surrounding neighbors that there is no military solution to the problems that we face in Iraq.
STEVE: Aargh . . .
OBAMA: We just heard a White House spokesman, Tony Snow, excuse the fact that the Iraqi legislature went on vacation for three weeks because it’s hot in Baghdad. Well, let me tell you: It is hot for American troops who are over there with 100 pounds worth of gear.
STEVE: Okay, everybody’s made that point.
STEVE: Don’t they have air conditioning in Baghdad?
ANDREW: Apparently not. There’s a freon embargo.
TIM: They need it to make bombs.
* * *
COOPER: Senator Biden, how do we pull out now? That was the question.
BIDEN: Anderson, you’ve been there. You know we can’t just pull out now. Let’s get something straight. It’s time to start to tell the truth.
TIM: Everything up to now has been a lie.
BIDEN: The truth of the matter is: If we started today, it would take one year, one year to get 160,000 troops physically out of Iraq, logistically. That’s number one.
Number two, you cannot pull out of Iraq without the follow-on that’s been projected here, unless you have a political solution. I’m the only one that’s offered a political solution. And it literally means separate the parties; give them jurisdiction in their own areas; have a decentralized government, a federal system. No central government will work.
And, thirdly, the fact of the matter is, the very thing everybody’s quoting is the very legislation I wrote in January. It said: Begin to draw down combat troops now; get the majority of the combat troops out by March of ’08.
STEVE: Okay, we’ve heard all this!
TIM: Well we have! No one else is dumb enough to watch every one of these things! No wonder it feels like a re-run. Now I know how the press feels following these guys around – ‘Hey, that guy just made the same speech an hour ago!’
COOPER: OK, time.
* * *
QUESTION: The 2006 election gave the Democrats in office a mandate to end the U.S. occupation of Iraq. Since that time, 800 of our military service members have died there. As the mother of an American soldier deploying to Iraq for a second time, I would like to know if the perception is true that the Democrats are putting politics before conscience. Is the reason why we are still in Iraq and seemingly will be for some time due to the Democrats’ fear that blame for the loss of the war will be placed on them by the Republican spin machine?
CLINTON: Well, I want to thank her and her son for their service and their sacrifice. When we send a soldier or Marine to combat in Iraq, we really are sending a family.
STEVE: Please. I hate when people get thanks for their service and sacrifice. It’s such bullshit.
CLINTON: And since the election of 2006, the Democrats have tried repeatedly to win Republican support with a simple proposition that we need to set a timeline to begin bringing our troops home now.
I happen to agree that there is no military solution, and the Iraqis refuse to pursue the political solutions. In fact, I asked the Pentagon a simple question . . .
STEVE: Here we go . . .
CLINTON: . . . Have you prepared for withdrawing our troops? In response, I got a letter accusing me of being unpatriotic; that I shouldn’t be asking questions.
STEVE: It would’ve been better if she didn’t write it cutting letters out of magazines.
COOPER: Time.
* * *
COOPER: Congressman Kucinich, the Democrats have been in power for seven months. Nothing has changed in Iraq.
KUCINICH: The answer to your question, ma’am, is: Yes, it is politics. The Democrats have failed the American people. When we took over in January, the American people didn’t expect us to give them a Democratic version of the war. They expected us to act quickly to end the war.
And here’s how we can do it. It doesn’t take legislation. That’s a phony excuse to say that you don’t have the votes. We appropriated $97 billion a month ago. We should tell President Bush, no more funds for the war, use that money to bring the troops home, use it to bring the troops home.
* * *
QUESTION: My name is Don. I’m from West Virginia. My question is for Mike Gravel. In one of the previous debates you said something along the lines of the entire deaths of Vietnam died in vain. How do you expect to win in a country where probably a pretty large chunk of the people voting disagree with that statement and might very well be offended by it?
GRAVEL: John, why would you think I would flip-flop? I’ve never flip-flopped before, and I like the question. I don’t get very many of them, but I’ll just tell you . . .
(LAUGHTER)
(APPLAUSE)
Thank you. Thank you. Has it been fair thus far? I’ll tell you, John, it’s a set up question. Our soldiers died in Vietnam in vain. You can now, John, go to Hanoi and get a Baskin-Robbins ice cream cone.
STEVE AND TIM: [Laughing so hard we can’t get a good line out. ANDREW has fallen asleep. But don’t get us wrong, Crazy Guy is right.]
GRAVEL: What did all these people die for? What are they dying for right now in Iraq every single day? Let me tell you: There’s only one thing worse than a soldier dying in vain; it’s more soldiers dying in vain.
ANDREW: And they die very well.
COOPER: Senator Obama, are the soldiers dying in Iraq in vain?
OBAMA: Our soldiers have done everything that’s been asked of them. They deposed Saddam Hussein. They have carried out extraordinarily difficult missions with great courage and great bravery. But, you know, one thing I have to say about Senator Clinton’s comments a couple of moments ago. I think it’s terrific that she’s asking for plans from the Pentagon, and I think the Pentagon response was ridiculous. But what I also know is that the time for us to ask how we were going to get out of Iraq was before we went in.
(APPLAUSE)
And that is something that too many of us failed to do. We failed to do it. And I do think that that is something that both Republicans and Democrats have to take responsibility for.
COOPER: To the question of, did the troops – are the troops dying in vain, though: Yes or no?
OBAMA: I never think that troops, like those who are coming out of The Citadel, who do their mission for their country, are dying in vain.
STEVE: They are dying in vain! That’s the point! Why are they so afraid to say that? ‘How can you ask the last man to die for a mistake?!’ That’s what makes it such a tragedy, otherwise the war would be justified!
COOPER: Senator Edwards, are the troops – did the troops in Vietnam die in vain?
EDWARDS: Senator Obama spoke just a minute ago about the White House agreeing that the parliament, the Iraqi parliament could take a month-long vacation because it was too hot, while our men and women are putting their lives on the line every day.
STEVE: Where are they going on vacation?
ANDREW: Basra. Sunny Basra.
TIM: Wouldn’t it be cool if they were going to Iran?
TIM: You think that’s why there’s no democracy in Saudi Arabia – it’s too hot?
(APPLAUSE)
* * *
QUESTION: My name is Tony Fuller from Wilson, Ohio, and I was wondering if the candidates feel women should register for the draft when they turn 18.
DODD: I’m an advocate of universal nation service, not by mandating it, but . . .
TIM: I’m in favor of universal voluntary national service.
STEVE: Isn’t that what we already have?
TIM: So why don’t we just get rid of the draft?!
* * *
GRAVEL: Well, of course I want to take credit and admit that I’m the guy that filibustered for five months, all by myself, in the Senate to end the draft in the United States of America.
STEVE: He talked for five months?
ANDREW: I read the phone book fifty times!
STEVE: He stood there for five months and didn’t go to the bathroom or anything?
TIM: He did it at home. It was a home filibuster. It was in his bathroom.
* * *
QUESTION: Hello, my name is John McAlpin. I’m a proud serving member of the United States military. I’m serving overseas. This question is to Senator Hillary Clinton. The Arab states, Muslim nations, believe it’s women as being second-class citizens. If you’re president of the United States, how do you feel that you would even be taken seriously by these states in any kind of talks, negotiations, or any other diplomatic relations? I feel that is a legitimate question.
CLINTON: Thank you, John, and thank you for your service to our country.
You know, when I was first lady, I was privileged to represent our country in 82 countries. I have met with many officials in Arabic and Muslim countries. I have met with kings and presidents and prime ministers and sheiks and tribal leaders.
ANDREW: I’ve met with women kings. With sultans and sultaneers.
TIM: They have another word for it.
STEVE: I think it’s sultanettes.
ANDREW (sternly): It’s sultaneers.
TIM: I was thinking of a female version of king.
ANDREW: Queen?
TIM: Yeah
* * *
QUESTION: In 1982, Anwar Sadat traveled to Israel, a trip that resulted in a peace agreement that has lasted ever since. In the spirit of that type of bold leadership, would you be willing to meet separately, without precondition, during the first year of your administration, in Washington or anywhere else, with the leaders of Iran, Syria, Venezuela, Cuba and North Korea?
OBAMA: I would. And the reason is this, that the notion that somehow not talking to countries is punishment to them – which has been the guiding diplomatic principle of this administration – is ridiculous.
TIM: Talking to them in is punishment.
TIM (alternate version): Talking down to them is punishment enough.
QUESTION: I’d be interested in knowing what Hillary has to say to that question.
CLINTON: Well, I will not promise to meet with the leaders of these countries during my first year. I will promise a very vigorous diplomatic effort because I think it is not that you promise a meeting at that high a level before you know what the intentions are.
STEVE: A more sophisticated answer.
CLINTON: I don’t want to be used for propaganda purposes. I don’t want to make a situation even worse. But I certainly agree that we need to get back to diplomacy, which has been turned into a bad word by this administration.
And I will purse very vigorous diplomacy.
And I will use a lot of high-level presidential envoys to test the waters, to feel the way. But certainly, we’re not going to just have our president meet with Fidel Castro and Hugo Chavez and, you know, the president of North Korea, Iran and Syria until we know better what the way forward would be.
QUESTION: By what date after January 21st, 2009, will all U.S. troops be out of Iraq? And how many family members do you have serving in uniform?
BIDEN: Number one, there is not a single military man in this audience who will tell this senator he can get those troops out in six months if the order goes today.
Let’s start telling the truth. Number one, you take all the troops out. You better have helicopters ready to take those 3,000 civilians inside the Green Zone where I have been seven times and shot at. You better make sure you have protection for them, or let them die, number one.
So we can’t leave them there. And it’s going to take a minimum 5,000 troops to 10,000 just to protect our civilians. So while you’re taking them out, Governor, take everybody out. That may be necessary.
Number three, the idea that we all voted – except for me – for that appropriation. That man’s son is dead. For all I know, it was an IED. Seventy percent of all the deaths occurred have been those roadside bombs. We have money in that bill to begin to build and send immediately mine-resistant vehicles that increase by 80 percent the likelihood none of your cadets will die, General. And they all voted against it.
How in good conscience can you vote not to send those vehicles over there as long as there’s one single, solitary troop there?
CLINTON: You know, I put forth a comprehensive three-point plan to get our troops out of Iraq, and it does start with moving them out as soon as possible.
But Joe is right. You know, I have done extensive work on this. And the best estimate is that we can probably move a brigade a month, if we really accelerate it, maybe a brigade and a half or two a month. That is a lot of months.
STEVE: This is the kind of thing she knows.
* * *
[Sultaneer/sultanette discussion resumes.]
TIM: Raisins of Swing?
* * *
(MUSIC VIDEO PRESENTATION OF A QUESTION ABOUT NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND)
COOPER: Governor Richardson, you have had to implement No Child Left Behind in your state. Would you scrap it? Revise it?
RICHARDSON: I would scrap it. It doesn’t work.
TIM: I would scrap it. I don’t think the music works at all with the lyrics.
ANDREW: Dylan was doing that fifty years ago.
RICHARDSON: It is the law. It is not just an unfunded mandate, but the one- size-fits-all doesn’t work.
ANDREW: It doesn’t work for me. I need an extra, extra, extra large.
RICHARDSON: [Blah blah blah] and I would have a major federal program of art in the schools, music, dancing, sculpture, and the arts.
ANDREW: I’d have a smart czar.
* * *
QUESTION: Hey, I’m Mike Green from Lexington, South Carolina. And I was wanting to ask all the nominees whether they would send their kids to public school or private school.
COOPER: We know, Senator Clinton, you sent your daughter to private school.
Senator Edwards, Obama and Biden also send your kids to private school.
Is that correct?
ANDREW: No, anyone can pay go to go those schools.
CLINTON: No.
COOPER: No?
CLINTON: No, it’s not correct.
COOPER: OK.
CLINTON: Chelsea went to public schools, kindergarten through eighth grade, until we moved to Washington. And then I was advised, and it was, unfortunately, good advice, that if she were to go to a public school, the press would never leave her alone, because it’s a public school. So I had to make a very difficult decision.
COOPER: Senator Obama?
CLINTON: But we were very pleased she was in public schools in Little Rock.
COOPER: Senator Obama?
OBAMA: My kids have gone to the University of Chicago Lab School, a private school, because I taught there . . .
ANDREW: I got a great deal on tuition.
OBAMA: . . . and it was five minutes from our house. So it was the best option for our kids.
But the fact is that there are some terrific public schools in Chicago that they could be going to. The problem is, is that we don’t have good schools, public schools, for all kids.
A U.S. senator can get his kid into a terrific public school. That’s not the question. The question is whether or not ordinary parents, who can’t work the system, are able to get their kids into a decent school, and that’s what I need to fight for and will fight for as president of the United States.
STEVE: A U.S. senator can work the system to get his kid into a terrific public school in Chicago? Has he talked to the mayor he endorsed about this?
(APPLAUSE)
* * *
QUESTION: Hi. My name is Anne, and I work at a Planned Parenthood in Pennsylvania.
ANDREW: I can’t tell you where.
* * *
QUESTION: Hey, there, my name’s Jackie Broyles. And I’m Dunlap [2nd person on video; both are yukkin’ it up hillbilly style]. We’re from Red State Update. Murfreesboro, Tennessee. This here question’s for all you candidates. Mainstream media seems awfully interested in old Al Gore these days. Is he losing weight? What’s it say in his book? Is he still worried about all the ice? They interpret all these as signs that he may or may not run. They really want to know if Al Gore’s going to run again. Yes. Well, what we want to know is does that hurt you-all’s feelings?
(APPLAUSE)
(LAUGHTER)
COOPER: Anybody have their feelings hurt?
BIDEN: Anderson . . .
COOPER: Yes?
BIDEN: I think the people of Tennessee just had their feelings hurt.
STEVE: Hey, we’ll do the snappy retorts, Joe.
* * *
QUESTION FROM A SNOWMAN: Hello, Democratic candidates. I’ve been growing concerned that global warming, the single most important issue to the snowmen of this country, is being neglected.
As president, what will you do to ensure that my son will live a full and happy life?
TIM: The Kennedy-Nixon debate is at 8. Following this.
TIM: Can you imagine if Lincoln and Douglas had to face this talking snowman? ‘To the honorable snowman from Vermont . . . ‘
(LAUGHTER)
(APPLAUSE)
COOPER: How many people here a private jet or a chartered jet to get here tonight?
STEVE: That private jet thing is bullshit. People have to get around, we’re not talking about eliminating airplanes and cars . . .
COOPER: Senator Gravel, what was that? You took the train?
GRAVEL: I took the train . . .
STEVE: What did he say?
ANDREW: He’s going across America on a moped.
TIM: I thought it was a John Deere riding mower.
QUESTION: Hi, my name is Shawn and I’m from Ann Arbor, Michigan. There is a scientific consensus for man-caused climate change, and I’ve heard each of you talk in previous debates about alternative energy sources like solar or wind, but I have not heard any of you speak your opinion on nuclear power. I believe that nuclear power is safer, cleaner, and provides a quicker avenue to energy independence than other alternatives.
QUESTION: I am curious what each of you believe.
STEVE: Obama is pro.
EDWARDS: Wind, solar, cellulose-based biofuels are the way we need to go. I do not favor nuclear power. We haven’t built a nuclear power plant in decades in this country. There is a reason for that. The reason is it is extremely costly. It takes an enormous amount of time to get one planned, developed and built. And we still don’t have a safe way to dispose of the nuclear waste. It is a huge problem for America over the long term.
OBAMA: I actually think that we should explore nuclear power as part of the energy mix. There are no silver bullets to this issue. We have to develop solar. I have proposed drastically increasing fuel efficiency standards on cars, an aggressive cap on the amount of greenhouse gases that can be emitted.
STEVE: He’s said he’s pro-nuclear; look how he finessed it.
COOPER: Senator Clinton, what is Senator Edwards – why is he wrong on nuclear power?
CLINTON: First of all, I have proposed a strategic energy fund that I would fund by taking away the tax break for the oil companies, which have gotten much greater under Bush and Cheney.
STEVE: Good answer. You know, the set design for this debate is terrific. The aesthetics, the background, the podiums . . .
TIM and ANDREW: [general agreement]
CLINTON: I’m agnostic about nuclear power. John is right, that until we figure out what we’re going to do with the waste and the cost, it’s very hard to see nuclear as a part of our future. But that’s where American technology comes in. Let’s figure out what we’re going to do about the waste and the cost if we think nuclear should be a part of the solution.
* * *
QUESTION: My name’s Melissa and I’m from San Luis Obispo, California. In recent years, there’s been so much controversy regarding dangling chads, then no paper trail in electronic systems. I know it costs money to amend things like that, but if I can go to any state and get the same triple grande, non-fat, no foam vanilla latte from Starbucks, why I can’t I go to any state and vote the same way?
STEVE: Why can’t I meet a woman who says something like that?
TIM: She never leaves the house. She just sits in front of her computer.
ANDREW: She’s married. To her professor.
COOPER: We’re going to take a short break. We’re going to go to break with a YouTube-style video from Senator Biden’s campaign.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
ANNOUNCER: Imagine you’re trapped deep in a hole with a group of politicians debating.
President Bush says the only way out of Iraq is to dig us deeper and deeper. But what if one leader stood up for us and said no, we can get out now, without leaving chaos behind?
ANDREW: We’ll stand on top of each other.
STEVE: What is a YouTube style campaign video – a candidate’s cat on a skateboard? They’re campaign ads!
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
KUCINICH: You can vote now to end the war in Iraq. Text Peace, 73223. Text peace now to send a message to the White House and to the Democratic Congress that now’s the time to end the war. Text Peace, 73223. Make your vote count and your voice be heard. Text Peace, 73223, to move this country away from war as an instrument of policy, and to achieve strength through peace. Text Peace.
STEVE: Is he saying ‘Text peace’?
TIM: Give peace a text.
* * *
QUESTION: If you’re elected to serve, would you be willing to do this service for the next four years and be paid the national minimum wage?
COOPER: So, it’s pretty simple, yes or no. Minimum wage, by the way, goes up tomorrow to $6.55. In 2009, it will be $7.25.
DODD: I have two young daughters who I’m trying to educate.. I don’t think I could live on the minimum wage, but I’m a strong advocate to seeing to it that we increase it at least to $9 or $10 to give people a chance out there to be able to provide for their families.
STEVE: So not the right answer.
OBAMA: Well, we can afford to work for the minimum wage because most folks on this stage have a lot of money. It’s the folks on that screen who deserve – you’re doing all right, Chris, compared to, I promise you, the folks who are on that screen.
STEVE: Score for Obama.
DODD: Not that well, I’ll tell you, Barack.
STEVE: How unwell could he be doing? He’s got that hair.
OBAMA: I mean, we don’t have – we don’t have Mitt Romney money, but . . .
BIDEN: I don’t have Barack Obama money either. My net worth is $70,000 to $150,000. That’s what happens you get elected at 29. I couldn’t afford to stay in the Congress for the minimum wage. But if I get a second job, I’d do it.
TIM, ANDREW, STEVE: [Discussion ensues about whether Joe Biden can really have such a relatively low net worth. We conclude he can’t. Or maybe he needs credit counseling.]
* * *
COOPER: Senator Obama, 45 million uninsured Americans. Senator Edwards says your plan doesn’t really provide universal coverage. Does it?
OBAMA: Absolutely it does.
STEVE: It does not. And he knows it.
* * *
QUESTION: Does your health care plan cover undocumented workers?
TIM: What about undocumented stem cells?
* * *
QUESTION: Hi. My name is Chris Nolan and I’m a Democratic precinct committeeman from Mundelein, Illinois. With Bush, Clinton, and Bush again serving as the last three presidents, how would electing you, a Clinton, constitute the type of change in Washington so many people in the heartland are yearning for, and what your campaign has been talking about?
I was also wondering if any of the other candidates had a problem with the same two families being in charge of the executive branch of government for 28 consecutive years, if Hillary Clinton were to potentially be elected and then re-elected.
CLINTON: Well, I think it is a problem that Bush was elected in 2000.
(APPLAUSE)
CLINTON: I actually thought somebody else was elected in that election, but . . .
(APPLAUSE)
CLINTON: Obviously, I am running on my own merits, but I am very proud of my husband’s record as president of the United States.
STEVE: Why penalize Hillary for George Bush stealing the election in 2000? Plus, she’s there on her merits. No one ever questions her qualifications. George Bush was there because of his daddy.
STEVE: Ask Obama if he has a problem with Richard M. Daley and Todd Stroger following their fathers inot their jobs. He endorsed ’em.
COOPER: Thirty seconds, Senator Gravel. Do you have a problem with it?
GRAVEL: Well, yes, I do, a serious problem. The Democratic Party used to stand for the ordinary working man. But the Clintons and the DLC sold out the Democratic Party to Wall Street.
Look at where all the money is being raised right now, for Hillary, Obama and Edwards. It’s the hedge funds, it’s Wall Street bankers, it’s the people who brought you what you have today.
Please wake up. Just look at The New York Times of the 17th of July that analyzes where the money’s coming from.
COOPER: Time’s up.
GRAVEL: It comes from the bankers on Wall Street and of course hedge funds, which is code for bankers on Wall Street. And they’re lock, stock and barrel in their pocket.
COOPER: Since you went to Senator Obama, we’ll let you respond, if you want.
OBAMA: Look, I think every single question we’ve heard you see cynicism about the capacity to change this country. And the question for the American people, who desperately want change, is: Who’s got a track record of bringing about change?
STEVE: Peter Fitzgerald, your predecessor! He took on corruption in Illinois while you were playing kissy-face with Emil Jones.
OBAMA: And that, I think, is going to be the kind of president that is going to be elected – is going to be nominated by the Democrats, and I believe that I’m best qualified to fill that role.
* * *
QUESTION: Hi, I’m Zenne Abraham in Oakland, California. This quarter reads “United States of America.” And when I turn it over, you find that it reads “liberty, in God we trust.” What do those words mean to you?
STEVE: God has no business being on our money.
BIDEN: Religion informs my values.
BIDEN: My reason dictates outcomes. My religion taught me about abuse of power. That’s why I moved to write the Violence Against Women Act.
STEVE: He wrote everything!
TIM: I wrote the script for The Terminator.
* * *
QUESTION: My name is Jered Townsend from Clio, Michigan. To all the candidates, tell me your position on gun control, as myself and other Americans really want to know if our babies are safe. This is my baby, purchased under the 1994 gun ban. Please tell me your views.
COOPER: Governor Richardson, you have one of the highest NRA ratings.
RICHARDSON: [Blah blah blah]
COOPER: Senator Biden, are you going to be able to keep his baby safe?
BIDEN: I’ll tell you what, if that is his baby, he needs help.
(APPLAUSE)
I think he just made an admission against self-interest. I don’t know that he is mentally qualified to own that gun. I’m being serious. Look, just like me, we go around talking about people who own guns. I am the guy who originally wrote the assault weapons ban . . .
COOPER: Time.
BIDEN: Anyway . . .
(APPLAUSE)
COOPER: We got one more question. Before . . .
BIDEN: . . . I hope he doesn’t come looking for me.
* * *
QUESTION: My name is Jason Koop, and I am from Colorado Springs, Colorado. I would like for each of you to look at the candidate to your left and tell the audience one thing you like and one thing you dislike about that particular candidate.
GRAVEL: I turn to my left and I like Chris Dodd. I knew his dad, I served with his dad. I do have a difference of opinion with respect to where the money’s coming from. I’ve advocated, people, follow the money if you want to find out what’s going to happen after any one of these individuals are elected. Follow the money, because it’s politics as usual is what you’re seeing.
DODD: I like John Edwards. I love his wife Elizabeth and his family, and I think we’ve had enough of negative in politics. I have nothing negative to say about the gentleman.
COOPER: You’re not going to answer the question. All right. Senator Edwards?
EDWARDS: I admire what Senator Clinton has done for America, what her husband did for America. I’m not sure about that coat.
STEVE: C’mon! That’s awful. It’s a cute coat.
CLINTON: I admire and like very much Barack, as I do with all of the candidates here. And I think that what you’ve seen tonight is how ready the Democrats are to lead.
COOPER: Alright. I’ll take that as you’re not going to answer.
OBAMA: I actually like Hillary’s jacket. I don’t know what’s wrong with it. And I like the fact that Bill Richardson has devoted his life to public service, because that, I think, is the highest of callings. I don’t like the fact that he either likes the Yankees or the Red Sox, but doesn’t apparently like the White Sox. And we’re having a tough time this year.
STEVE: Ugh.
RICHARDSON: You know, let me just say, I love all of the candidates here. In fact, I think they would all do great in the White House as my vice president.
STEVE: Ha ha ha! Hardy har har.
RICHARDSON: Let me say something about Joe Biden. We disagree on Iraq very strongly, on Darfur. But this man has devoted his whole life to public service. He’s been a distinguished chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee. He’s had great contributions in civil rights, in issues relating to gun control, in Supreme Court nominees. He will make an excellent secretary of state for me.
BIDEN: I don’t like a damn thing about him. I – no, I’m only kidding. Only kidding. Dennis and I have been friends for 25 years. I think this is a ridiculous exercise. Dennis, the thing I like best about you is your wife.
STEVE: Uh-oh. This question is Gaffe City.
COOPER: Congressman Kucinich, talk about Senator Gravel.
KUCINICH: Wait a minute. He talked about my wife.
COOPER: Well . . .
KUCINICH: You notice what CNN did. They didn’t put anybody to the left of me. Think about it.
(LAUGHTER)
COOPER: I’m not sure it would be possible to find anybody.
(LAUGHTER)
(APPLAUSE)
KUCINICH: And you know what? And you know – and I’m glad I get a chance to debate you to my left, because there’s no one more mainstream on the war and on health care and on trade than I am, Anderson.
Now, about Senator Gravel: Didn’t he show great courage during the Vietnam War, when he exposed what was going on with the Pentagon Papers. Really courageous American. I’m proud that he’s up here.
Thank you, Senator Gravel.
END.
–
BEACHWOOD ANALYSIS: The strongest night for the candidates collectively. Hillary was very solid. Edwards had a decent night. Biden had a good night. Obama had a good night, a notch below Hillary, Edwards and Biden. Kucinich and Gravel were the same as usual – the most honest ones up there. Richardson was awful, and Dodd is a non-factor.
–
See the Mystery Debate Theater collection.
Posted on July 24, 2007