By Carl Mohrbacher

Coming off of a string of demoralizing losses, the only real reason to tune into a Bears game at this juncture is to find out what kind of fight the 2015 squad has left in them.
Apparently, quite a bit.
The Bucs presented two major mismatches with Mike Evans at wide receiver and Doug Martin in the backfield.
I can only assume Bears defensive coordinator Vic Fangio drew from the wisdom I provided in last week’s column to design a winning defensive scheme.
[Editor’s Note: Did that “wisdom” appear before or after you introduced a character named Stan “The Herpes Outbreak” Stanton?]

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Posted on December 30, 2015

By Steve Rhodes

Forget the Bears meaningless, mediocre win over the Tampa Bay Buccaneers on Sunday. This tweetstream perhaps best sums up the local fanboy media

Wish I could grab a photo, but Matt Slauson is just chilling on the sideline with no shirt on. Classic.

— Adam Hoge (@AdamHoge) December 27, 2015

What’s so “classic” about this? It was 80 degrees. But Bears media was captivated.

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Posted on December 28, 2015

By Carl Mohrbacher

Deflated, planar, procumbent, supine, prone.
In other words: flat.
By the end of Sunday’s first half, the Bears had reverted from an undermanned but competitive squad to a team so listless and uninspired that they looked less like a football team and more like the “Welcome” mat placed before the pedestal that will one day support the bronze bust of Teddy Bridgewater’s head in Canton.

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Posted on December 24, 2015

By Steve Rhodes

The Bears are who we thought they were – a pretty lousy team that managed to eke out a few wins and fool the easily fooled around here that they were new, improved, and possibly even a playoff contender. Ha!

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Posted on December 21, 2015

By Jim Coffman and Steve Rhodes

Can Rick Hahn’s rescue mission overcome the lameness of his manager? Plus: We Have Jason Heyward, Can We Ditch The Onesies Now?; Everyone Still Upset That The Bulls Are Winning So Much; and Corey Crawford Hotter Than Cory Matthews.

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Posted on December 18, 2015

By Carl Mohrbacher

Step Five: Acceptance
It has not been a great 14 days for Robbie Gould. During that span, the All-Pro has missed three field goals which, if made, would have propelled the Bears into the playoff contention.
I mean, if you consider being two games out of the last playoff spot with three to play “contention.”
“But dude,” you say in the voice like that of the Goonies monster, “if Gould makes those field goals, the Bears are 7-6 and are playing the team ahead of them in the standings this week. They would’ve been right there!”

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Posted on December 17, 2015

By Roger Wallenstein

With all the flashy, headline-grabbing moves the Cubs have made the past few weeks, we Sox fans could be excused for feeling like a stray mongrel watching the purebreds parade their wares at the Westminster Show.
But we’re moving up in the world. Not enough to gain admittance to Madison Square Garden, but we don’t have to feel like a stray canine, scavenging the alley for leftovers anymore. We’ve been rescued.

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Posted on December 16, 2015

By Jim Coffman

The biggest story is still the quarterback, and the biggest question is if John Fox will avoid assigning too much significance to Jay Cutler’s 2015 stats.
As the Bears extended their run Sunday of brutally bad play at home to well over a season overall (losing nine of the last 10 games played at Soldier Field), somehow Jay Cutler emerged to rave reviews.

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Posted on December 14, 2015

By Jim Coffman and Steve Rhodes

Now World Series favorites. Plus: Hey White Sox, How You Doin’?; Bulls Spiting Selves; Bears Good As Mold; and Patrick Kane’s Fraudulent Point Streak.

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Posted on December 11, 2015

By Carl Mohrbacher

Bizarro* Bears
Last Sunday’s game featured a topsy-turvy inversion of what we’ve come to expect of the 2015 Bears.
Kick returns were solid and consistently put the offense in good field position.
Colin Kaepernick’s seemingly less mobile backup torched the Chicago defense for a late, game-tying score.
Jay Cutler threw a pick six.
Robbie Gould failed on two field goal attempts including the chip shot final play of regulation.
Dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria!

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Posted on December 10, 2015