Chicago -
By Stephanie B Goldberg
1. “I’m taking my case to the people.”
Say, Rod, how’s that working out for you? Maybe you’ll boycott the criminal trial too?
2. Cadillac spokesmodel Kate Walsh wants to know: When you turn your car on, does it return the favor?
Only if you pop for the non-standard attachment.
Posted on January 30, 2009
By The Beachwood Bureaucrat Affairs Desk
“Mayor Richard Daley to name CTA chief Ron Huberman to lead city schools.”
* Start times become flexible.
* “The third-grade is delayed today due to heavy snow. Please choose alternate grades.”
* KidTracker!
* New evacuation procedures leave kids stranded in basement.
* Slow zones introduced in every third school while books are re-binded.
Posted on January 27, 2009
By J.J. Tindall
J.J. TINDALL IS
J.J. Tindall is keeping people from hanging out in front of the drug store.
J.J. Tindall is approaching the summit of Mt. Everest and will check back in a few hours.
J.J. Tindall is rather fancying it.
J.J. Tindall is not contesting the charges outlined in the Impeachment but will also not resign.
J.J. Tindall is relieved of his duties.
J.J Tindall is declaring moral bankruptcy.
J.J. Tindall is insisting on a Pre-Nup.
J.J. Tindall is about to hit the wall!
J.J. Tindall is absorbed into the budget.
J.J. Tindall is emasculating.
J.J. Tindall is curtains.
J.J. Tindall is not a celebrity endorsement.
J.J. Tindall is faithfully executing the office.
Posted on January 26, 2009
By Dan Simon
The inauguration of Barack Obama as president has been the news story around the world for the past several days. Tokyo, too, has become engrossed in Obama-mania. My current employer, Yomiuri Co., mandated that the first four pages of its English-language daily paper be devoted exclusively to Obama stories. This included the national pages. In addition, the paper put out an inauguration extra early in the morning of the 21st.
One story printed on January 22, “Eyes of Japanese focused on Obama” contained reactions from Japanese across the country on Obama’s speech. As I was editing it, the following passage caught my eye:
Posted on January 23, 2009
By The Beachwood Tabloid Affairs Desk
The Beachwood Tabloid Affairs Desk has learned that the Sun-Times is considering the following competitive responses to the Tribune’s new tabloid edition.
* Eliminate paper and just sell Obama merchandise.
* Make S-T “to-goier.”
* Replace paper with the Chicago Sun-Twitter.
* Trade Rich Roeper to the Tribune for the installation disk for Mac 10.5.
* New “Sun-Times At Night” edition for adults only.
Posted on January 22, 2009
By Steve Rhodes
Inauguration Day as told by my Facebook feed. Some names have been removed to protect the unwitting.
*
Favorite Inauguration-related text of the day: “I can’t get over Michelle Obama wearing Green Bay colors.”
about an hour ago
–
Rick Kaempfer ‘s 6-year-old son Sean noticed people crying in the crowd and said: “Dad, people really hate this speech.”
–
Lisa didn’t get teary until the “protect and defend the constitution” line of the oath.
Comment: I liked that part! It was a rather obvious jab at W!
Posted on January 21, 2009
By Michelin and NASA
Michelin technology provides astronauts with a smooth ride up Pennsylvania Avenue for 56th presidential inauguration celebration
GREENVILLE, S.C., Jan. 20 – Michelin North America will once again team with NASA to showcase the latest technology for the next generation of moon rover vehicles. NASA astronauts will pilot the Small Pressurized Lunar Rover, which is fitted with a specially engineered MICHELIN TWEEL(R) assembly, during today’s inaugural parade in Washington, D.C.
“Michelin and NASA have a long history of successful collaboration. For more than 20 years, Michelin has supplied tires for the space shuttle. Over the past three years, we have also worked with NASA to develop a revolutionary tire/wheel assembly for the next generation of lunar rovers,” said David Stafford, chief operating officer of Michelin Americas Research Company. “We are pleased that NASA, one of the world’s most demanding customers, has selected Michelin to accompany them as millions see this amazing vehicle showcased for the first time.”
The Small Pressurized Lunar Rover, NASA’s latest lunar rover prototype, will roll from the U.S. Capitol to the White House on the MICHELIN TWEEL(R) non-pneumatic tire/wheel assembly, which was named one of Time magazine’s innovations of the year in 2005. As a result of this engineering breakthrough, NASA helped fund a project for Michelin to develop a highly specialized Lunar Wheel for the space agency’s latest collection of moon rover vehicles.
Introduced in 2008, the MICHELIN Lunar Wheel withstands extreme conditions while maintaining flexibility and constant ground contact pressure that enables moon rovers to traverse loose soil and lunar craters. It also has a low mass yet maintains a high load capacity that is 3.3 times more efficient than the original Apollo Lunar Rover wheels.
“Field data taken last November demonstrated that the MICHELIN Lunar Wheel provides a 50 percent improvement in rolling efficiency over loose soil, compared to a traditional inflated tire,” said Dr. Rob Ambrose, Surface Mobility Lead for NASA’s Lunar Architecture Team. “Michelin met or exceeded our targets in analog lunar testing.”
Designed to provide astronauts with mobility over extreme terrain, the Small Pressurized Lunar Rover features 12 wheels driven by two electric motors through a two-speed transmission, allowing it to perform in “bulldozer” mode with up to 4000 pounds of force or cruise at up to 20 kilometers per hour. The modular design also means that the tubular frame can be fitted with several different crew and payload combinations, including the crew cabin that attaches to the rover’s chassis to form the Small Pressurized Lunar Rover configuration.
In addition to engineering wheels for the Small Pressurized Lunar Rover, Michelin has developed Lunar Wheels for NASA’s ATHLETE moon rover designed by Jet Propulsion Laboratory, as well as for the Scarab moon rover. Both are unmanned lunar vehicles designed to perform various tasks on the moon.
Posted on January 20, 2009
By Stephanie B Goldberg
1. Bonnie and Clyde, starring Hillary Duff. Why? I’m guessing that Patti Blagojevich was busy.
2. He plays guitar. He writes books. He covers war. And, yes girls, he’s single.
Posted on January 16, 2009
By The Beachwood Meetup Affairs Desk
The newest Chicagloand meetups.
–
Wives Who Hate Sports.com
*
Chicago Success and Personal Development Meetup Group
*
The Chicago Lost Viewing Meetup Group
*
Chicago Jewish Experience Book Club
*
The Carol Stream Gaming Group
Posted on January 14, 2009
By J.J. Tindall
MY NEW JOB
My new job
is finding
my new job.
My new office
is straddling
my small crib.
Posted on January 12, 2009
