By Eric Emery

I’m not one to pimp products. But I must say, the new pancakes at IHOP rock the house. I mean, if I happen to be in the mood for pancakes at 7:30 p.m., I’d eat them, and I’m pretty sure I’d like them. Why am I excited about pancakes I’ve never consumed? A friend from high school is the star of the commercial for said pancakes. So as a good friend, it’s my job to sell a few stacks. But this got me to thinking: what product placement opportunities is the NFL missing out on? Let’s take a look.
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Opportunity: Al Davis
Advertiser: Circuit City
Why: The intellectually bankrupt should shop at a bankrupt store. Plus, he’s blown all his circuits. Ha ha.
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Opportunity: Cowboys fans
Advertiser: Soft Surroundings
Why: Banging your head against a brick wall hurts.

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Posted on November 14, 2008

By Eric Emery

As I write this, I have one eye on my writing, and one eye on history. It’s clich to talk about how important the civic duty of voting is in comparison to the simple game of football. Most media coverage I listened to emphasized the greatness of the American democratic process, and glossed over all of its idiosyncrasies. Good thing these idiosyncrasies are not part of the NFL, or fans would riot.
* Large market teams wear shiny new safety equipment; small market teams wear wool sweaters with leather helmets.
* Some fans stand in line for three hours to watch the game, others walk move directly to their seats.
* When scoreboard goes down, 12,242 fans file lawsuits instantly.

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Posted on November 6, 2008