Chicago -
By Tim Willette and Natasha Julius
David Blaine: Seriously Not Breathing
David Blaine: Drowned Alive, Yet Brain Dead?
David Blaine: Buried Alive Until He Rots
David Blaine: Beheaded
David Blaine: Beaten With A Rolling Pin
David Blaine: Thrown From A Tall Building
David Blaine: Eaten By Sharks
Posted on May 8, 2006
By Marilyn Ferdinand
Like a girl branded with a bad reputation, director Paul Verhoeven’s 1995 film Showgirls has been called every nasty name in the book:
“Perhaps the worst film of the year.” (Kim Williamson, Boxoffice magazine)
“Think Flashdance but with an unappealing leading lady playing a woman whose fierce ambition is to do something not admirable, just ridiculous.” (Mick LaSalle, San Francisco Chronicle)
“A waste of a perfectly good NC-17 rating.” (Roger Ebert, Chicago Sun-Times)
“Just plain awful.” (Bob Thompson, Jam! Movies)
Showgirls drew attention to itself by garnering a rare NC-17 rating and because its screenwriter, Joe Eszterhas, became the highest-paid screenwriter in history for his series of sexploitative films, most notably Basic Instinct. Roger Ebert and many other critics who piled on Showgirls seized upon how poorly the film lived up to its rating. Others latched onto the noble-minded but ill-considered claptrap Eszterhas served up (that making the film was “a religious experience” for him) to make the film a laughingstock and skewer Eszterhas for polluting us with his personal fantasies. Still others called Showgirls a camp classic, with bad dialogue and stick-figure characters that could be imitated readily at the Baton Club for fun and profit.
Now that we’re 10 years beyond the hype, it’s time for a new appraisal of Showgirls, prompted by a recent bashing the film took in The Beachwood Reporter‘s Must-See TV box. I’ll take on the criticisms first, then provide a new take on this unfairly maligned film.
Posted on May 1, 2006
What It Is: A system of investing.
Description: A system of investing that makes money, as opposed to losing money. Apparently, the name “Optionetics” is the marriage of “options” and “pathetic.”
Shills: George Fontanills, whose qualifications include appearances in stock footage for CNN and CNBC. Grace Carter quarterbacks the Optionetics effort from behind an anchor desk complete with fake stock ticker running in the background. If you watch carefully, you’ll see the ticker runs from the same point during each Grace Carter appearance.
Set and costume: Carter appears svelte in business attire. Fontanills has exercised too many “put” options at the buffet.
Patriot Act: The background imagery during Carter’s hard-hitting “interview” with Fontanills includes the United States Treasury building and an American flag. Not included: Footage of Alexander Hamilton rolling over in his grave.
Quote: “Make money no matter if the market is going up, going down, or going sideways.”
Posted on May 1, 2006
