Chicago - Aug. 17, 2018
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Life at Work

By J. Bird
I was once really really desperate to learn goat husbandry in the Arizona desert. Didn't happen. This isn't a world where you can really be whatever you want to be.

Posted on September 29, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
My parents are returning home soon from vacation. I'm adjusting my personal threat level to orange.

Posted on September 28, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
Even the unemployed call in sick sometimes.

Posted on September 27, 2006

Pass the Charter: A Guide To Chicago's New Schools

By The Beachwood Classroom Affairs Desk
Among the new charter schools on tap for next year: The Uptown Downsizing Academy, training future business leaders in the economics of workplace wealth transfer.

Posted on September 26, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
It's not only payday I miss; it's the anticipation of payday as it nears. I also miss that loud office guy talking about his weekend nightclub conquests.

Posted on September 26, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
Someone told my parents I no longer have a job. That wasn't part of the plan. Now I must find the leaker and exact revenge.

Posted on September 25, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
I tested above the 50th percentile, so at least I can still claim to be above average, even if I don't know how to use Excel.

Posted on September 22, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
Doesn't everybody lose their Social Security card? I mean, do you know where yours is?

Posted on September 21, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
I don't want to face it again. Not the getting fired part; the getting hired part.

Posted on September 20, 2006

Indisputably Torture

By Rick Kaempfer
Re-defining torture so the president doesn't have to.

Posted on September 19, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
If you have too many days where you don't get out of bed, you seem to lose some sense of . . . something. I'm not sure what. But something.

Posted on September 19, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
I have no pressing engagements. Just a pressing, re-occuring thought: "Well, hell, do I really need to get out of my pajamas today?"

Posted on September 18, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
My dad is a totally rational person until he hears me say something like, "I think I'm going to apply to be a private eye." Then he totally loses his shit.

Posted on September 15, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
I guess the Boss really did think I was as dumb as I thought he thought I was.

Posted on September 14, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
Technically I wasn't "fired" or "terminated." I just wasn't the "right fit."

Posted on September 13, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
Sometimes work sucks even more than usual.

Posted on September 12, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
Better to stay home from work one day than feel lousy at work for several, and wind up on antibiotics. No matter what The Boss thinks.

Posted on September 11, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
When you work in a building a gajillion feet in the air, the Internet is your only access to the outside world. When the Net goes down, you're fucked.

Posted on September 8, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
Being a downtown drone in a black suit is, most decidedly, not who I am. And yet, that is who I am forced to be 40 hours a week.

Posted on September 7, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
When I get home from work, my dog has to wait til I've changed into my "real" clothes before I'll play with him, not because I don't want my work clothes to get dirty, but because I can't stand to wear them for another minute.

Posted on September 6, 2006

Life at Work

By J. Bird
There's currently a battle in the suite in which I work. It's between individuals who work on either side of reception. It's the office equivalent of Civil War.

Posted on September 5, 2006

MUSIC - Our Aretha.
TV - Tribune: Sinclair Blew Sure Thing.
POLITICS - Dems Fake FCC Oversight.
SPORTS - The Ex-Cub Factor.

BOOKS - Trying To Prove God Exists.

PEOPLE PLACES & THINGS - Foxconn Flooding Alert.


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