By Ed Hammer
Donald Trump is seriously considering asking Dr. Walter J. Palmer, lion killer, to join him as running mate even before the 2016 primaries begin, a source wishing to remain anonymous to avoid embarrassment by association says.
“Donald is looking for a man with true courage,” the source says. “He was impressed by Doc Palmer’s trip to the Dark Continent, where he bagged Zimbabwe’s most notorious killer with only a bow and arrow.”
Trump is said to have told his closest advisers that “This lion guy is an authentic hero, unlike John McCain. McCain probably doesn’t even own a bow and arrow. And all the other Republican candidates are losers. I wouldn’t want any of them on my ticket. I want winners who can bring me the head of a wild beast on a platter.”
Meanwhile, Republican opposition researchers were working feverishly to connect Palmer’s visit to Zimbabwe to the Benghazi scandal, seeing as how both are located in Africa.
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Ed Hammer is a retired police captain and author of the book One Hundred Percent Guilty. He can be reached through his website.
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Previously by Ed Hammer:
* George Ryan’s Park Bench
* George Ryan’s Dogs and Ponies
* George Ryan’s Other Jailhouse Interview
* Bugging The Chicago School Board
* Cop vs. Teacher
* Signs of Change
* Pols vs. Teachers
* The Terre Haute Redemption
* Rahm’s War On Teachers
* About Those Indicted Nurses
* Body Language Bingo: A Guide To Watching The Presidential Debates
* George Ryan’s Day Of Independence
* The Ironic George Ryan.
* George Ryan Is Unrepentant.
* Must Like Puppies.
* ILGov2014: The George Ryan Connection.
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See also: Honoring A True Illinois Hero.
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Comments welcome.
Posted on July 30, 2015